Mature children and character go together like a grand building with a strong foundation. Our parenting expert and psychologist, Dr. C.R. Partridge, will share the 4 cornerstones of character. If you're a parent you can help your child mature when you know these cornerstones.
"Very little attention, however, has been devoted to the character cornerstones of competent living. We are aware that other cultures have emphasized the virtues of self-discipline through delayed gratification, tolerance to frustration, and similar examples of personal and social maturity.
We are paying more attention to the whole issue of moral development as our nation becomes increasingly concerned about the potential for deadly violence in our youth.
Ethicists have probed the ways that moral concepts and values are learned. But these studies are focused on the responsibility of the individual toward others. They offer little consideration of the broader issue of character competence as it relates to a child's capacity to fulfill his responsibility toward his own developing future.
Children Need to Learn to Control Their Own Lives
A nine-year-old boy named Eric was described by his dad - "Eric can build an airtight case to show that none of his troubles were ever his fault. Except when I really land on him, he seems perfectly happy to go around being a lazy bully."
Out-of-control children like Eric show us that it is not enough to be healthy, happy, and emotionally comfortable and confident. Not if we fall below the minimum plateau of competence required to begin taking control of our own lives.
What are these basic cornerstones of character and human competence? As I mentioned in Chapter 4, I see them reduced to four issues:
The 4 Cornerstones of Character
1. Ability to take responsibility for one's self and to move beyond blaming others and external circumstances.
2. Ability to give up being the center of one's social world and to develop a 50/50 give-and-take capability.
3. Ability to defer gratification and inhibit impulses.
4. Ability to accept frustration without "blowing up" or "falling apart." (Pages 70-71)
These cornerstones show us the direction we want to guide our children. No one wants to raise an Eric. To find out how to raise your child with character take a look at Dr. Partridge's book:
Building Character Skills in the Out-of-Control Child. It's available on Amazon.com
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Jean Tracy, MSS
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