Does your student want to host a high school after prom party at your house. If so, listen to our parenting expert and author of Messengers in Denim, Dr. Par Donahue. His grandson created some rules that you are free to use.
With spring in the air, can high school proms be far behind? They will be here sooner than parents think, and later than most high school kids (girls especially) can wait.
Each spring I have posted Post-Prom Party rules developed by one of my high school grandsons. He is now a sophomore at Notre Dame and gave me permission to post them.
I am posting them again in hopes they will help parents and prom goers make their post-prom party happy, safe, and more fun! So, here goes.
Spring brings forth proms, and proms suggest post-prom parties, and post-prom parties cause major parental anxiety, or at least they should! But it doesn’t have to be that way!
A couple of years ago, one of my grandsons wanted to host a post-prom party, so his parents asked him to decide what the rules of conduct would be. If the parents agreed with the rules, he would be allowed to have the party. With his permission and that of his parents I submit his guidelines for what turned out to be a great party.
He and his girlfriend, high school juniors, planned the party; they made up the following rules to govern conduct at the party and had them approved by his parents. (Which is the way I think house rules should be decided.) He and she also decided what the punishment would be for an infraction of the rules.
Lest you think he is a geek, let me assure you he is not. He has one of the top GPA’s in his class, plays in the marching band, is an Eagle Scout, has a black belt in karate, and is the kind of guy you would want your teens to have for a friend. I sure am proud of him! I have deleted his name and the names of his parents, but the party invitation below is exactly as he wrote it.
“Hey, guys, in case I haven’t told you yet, you’re invited to an after-prom party at my house! My mom just wants to make sure that everyone knows some ground rules. If you are to attend, please email her at XXXXXXXX.net with a confirmation that you understand and agree to these rules.
Rules and Regulations for the After-prom Party:
‘Because we care about you…”
1. All rules and regulations enumerated herein have been agreed upon by Mr. and Mrs. XXXXXXXX, and all attendees of the after-party must abide by the following or parents will be notified to collect the offending person(s).
2. No non-prescription drugs, stimulants, depressants, hallucinogens, alcohol, tobacco, club drugs,
inhalants, mushrooms, narcotics, etc. are allowed.
3. No friends of invitees permitted unless they were invited by the host couple (John Doe and Jane Doe).
4. After quiet time (2:50 a.m. ±) begins, girls are to be confined to the guest room and guys are to be confined to the upstairs level. Mr. and Mrs. XXXXXXXX will be sleeping in the hallway/staircase region to prevent “purple” rooms.
5. No intense intimate relations. Mr. XXXXXXXX defines intimate as “anything more than a chaste kiss. Leave room for the Holy Spirit.”
6. All guests must depart by 9:00 a.m. (to be changed?).
7. After the party, all guests must help to clean up (spills, trash, messes, etc.).
8. All guests must stay within the presence of others, and nobody/no small groups of people are allowed outside unless all are willing to go outside. House alarms will be set upon the group’s
arrival from prom.
9. Do not do anything that you do not want Mr. XXXXXXXX to put pictures of on Facebook.
10. Be nice, no drama please.
11. If you wish to bring a movie(s), it(they) must be rated G, PG, or PG-13. All other movies will be
12. If you wish to bring video games, they must be EC, E, E10+, or T. All other video games will be
confiscated. If one wishes to bring a video game system(s), that (those), too, is (are) allowed.
13. Music considered offensive by Mr. and Mrs. XXXXXXXX is not allowed either. If you would not go up to them and speak the lyrics to them conversationally, do not play that song.
14. Forbidden activities include Laptag, Spin the Bottle, Truth or Dare? etc. Other activities can be forbidden on the spot by Mr. and Mrs. XXXXXXXX
15. The 10 Commandments are in effect at all times. A list of these is posted in the kitchen to aid anyone who might not understand them completely.”
Some 12 or 14 couples came and I was told by my grandson that no one was asked to leave and everybody had a great time. If you are sorry your kids were not invited to a party of this kind, let
them plan their own party. Just copy my grandson’s rules and have a great time.
Let's THANK Dr. Donahue for sharing his grandson's prom rules. They will make your teens safe and happy.
Pick up Messengers in Denim and find out the wonderful things Dr. Donahue, as a pediatrician, has learned from them.
Available at Amazon.com
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