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Motivation ~ How Parents Teach Kids the Art of Decision-Making

To motivate, parents must teach kids the art of decision-making. Kids need to see the difference between what's worthwhile and what isn't. Let's see how this mom describes it. 

Teaching Kids the Art of Decision-Making

"If the task is socially necessary, there are motivators built in. For example, right now my kid is cooking dinner. If she gives up, we will all go hungry.

Deciding when giving up is appropriate and when it's not can be tricky!  It's the decision-making that's important. When your child's chooses to do something, he must decide it's worthwhile to pursue.

You can help your child decide to do what is meaningful, give up the rest, and develop the wisdom to distinguish one from another." ~  Maria Droujkova

How Parents Teach Kids the Art of Decision-Making 

Pretend your child is trying to decide about turning out for soccer. Help him by discussing the pros and cons. Ask questions like:

1. Can you name 3 good reasons for playing soccer?

2. Are there any good reasons for not playing soccer?

3. Which reasons are the most important to you?

The answers will help your child make a good decision. Can you see how easy it is to teach the art of decision-making?  Just ask the right questions and discuss the answers with your kids. It's simple. It's fun too.

Please Comment on How You Motivate Your Kids  

If you do, I'll email you a FREE Copy of my list for 21 of the Best Learning Toys for Kids from Birth to 12.

How? Just leave your comment about motivating kids in the comment link below and I'll email you your FREE copy.

With warm wishes,

Jean Tracy, MSS

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Motivation ~ Parents Can Motivate Kids by Quieting Their Noisy Minds

Can parents motivate kids with noisy minds? Expert Coach Gerrianne Clare suggests that unmotivated kids may have too many 'shoulds' set by parents, teachers, and others. These shoulds puts their minds in overdrive. Kids feel stressed. Let's find out more from Gerrianne. 

One of the Greatest Tools Kids Can Learn Is the Art of Quieting Their Minds

"Give kids permission to silence those inner thoughts that can paralyze them from doing anything. Silence the constant mind chatter about not being good enough, or doing enough.  Sometimes it's outside chatter and nagging to do more and be more that needs to be silenced. Help them find a way to develop a quiet, loving, and nurturing relationship with themselves. It can be incredibly rewarding and it can motivate them in the long run.

As adults we have a challenge in cultivating this relationship with ourselves. To model this behavior with our kids, the change begins with us. One of the tools I help people with is 5 steps to help quiet your mind chatter. This is available through my Family Guidance system program at http://www.familyguidancesystem.com  "~ Gerrianne Clare

Please Comment on How You Motivate Your Kids  

If you do, I'll email you a FREE Copy of my list for 21 of the Best Learning Toys for Kids from Birth to 12.

How? Just leave your comment about Raising Motivated Kids in the comment link below and I'll email you your FREE copy.

With warm wishes,

Jean Tracy, MSS

One more thing:

Join our Parenting Skills Blog at http://www.ParentingSkillsBlog.com and receive FREE "Motivation~33 Expert Ways to Motivate Your Kids"


Motivation ~ Parenting Tips for Helping Kids Gain Self-Satisfaction

Motivation works best when kids gain self-satisfaction. This mother works with her girls to see the satisfaction they can gain if they try. Find out what she does inside.

"Arrgh! Motivation is not a simple topic! Motivation can be words of encouragement, positive affirmations, avoiding the negatives, and boosting the positives.
 
I teach my girls life is not a competition, if you do something it is for yourself and for your own self-satisfaction. I tell them there is no harm in asking for help. In fact, it’s excellent to ask for help. It encourages team spirit, the learning process, and a keen understanding of our own limitations.

In the young child I use a combination of flattery, rainbow charts, ego boosting, humor, lots of hugs, and little steps towards goals.

In the older child I seek out the worries and help them find the path that gives them self-motivation. If it is simply because they hate something but they have to do it, I try to find the one thing that will turn it around to being a bit more interesting. Math, for instance, is the big, ‘Do I have too?’ in our house. However, it's usually because the questions are dry or the solution limited. So we look to color it up a bit by introducing a practical side or alternative break down method.

Money is not a motivation I use but having friends come for a sleep over is.

I sponsored my elder child in a task in which she was insecure. I took the focus off her fear, and placed it on gaining something for her chosen charity. I did this when she was forced to take part in a school sports day which she really found difficult, due to her dyspraxia. She went off determined to fleece me out of my ‘dress fund,’ and succeeded! LOL! Funny because this is the same child, who would rock climb all day, if given the chance.

But above all, I take the time to show our girls they have the ability to achieve anything if they only give it a go. If it doesn’t work out, they can take heart that they tried because from each trial a new thing is learned."  ~ Mrs. Sanders

What I Like about Mrs Sander's Parenting Tips for Motivating Kids:

Her last line..."because from each trial something new is learned" flows through her motivating ideas. I smiled at how she focused her daughter away from fear to achieving something for her favorite charity.

She gave many examples for motivating young children. As her daughters have grown she's moved on to sleep overs and focusing on the good in the challenges her girls face, even math.

Mrs. Sanders sounds like a positive mother who adds fun to her motivating talent.

Would You Please Add to Mrs. Sander's Ideas for Motivating Kids?  

If you do, I'll email you a FREE Copy of my list for 21 of the Best Learning Toys for Kids from Birth to 12.

How? Just leave your comment about Raising Motivated Kids in the comment link below and I'll email you your FREE copy. Be sure to leave your name and email address to make sure you receive it.

With warm wishes,

Jean Tracy, MSS

One more thing:

Join our Parenting Skills Blog at http://www.ParentingSkillsBlog.com and receive FREE "Motivation~33 Expert Ways to Motivate Your Kids"


Parenting Tips ~ Learn What Kids Need to Boost Their Motivation!

Motivation  is difficult when you don't know why kids say, "I can't" or "I don't know how." Let's find out what this mother does to find out why children give up.

Motivation Problems and Solutions:

"I think asking questions about kids' reluctance to trying is important like,  'What do you think might happen?'  For older children, offering open-ended discussions is important.

There are other times when children don't want to put on shoes or another task they are capable of. This is when I give them space and set them to the task with a simple, 'Well, I need you to put on those shoes before we go outside. I see you aren't ready yet, so I'm going to go take care of something else (like dishes, packing a diaper bag, or whatever else removes the focus of attention from the child).' 

I tell the child, 'I'll check in with you when I'm finished.' This allows me to pull away from the situation. It conveys the message that I feel the child is capable. It also reassures them  I'll come back and offer help if they still have trouble.

Sometimes, kids want connection from us parents when they say they can't do things they are capable of like getting dressed or other self-care tasks. This is why your typical 3-5 year old regresses horribly before preschool/kindergarten with,  'I don't know how' when they are getting ready in the morning. What they really mean is 'I want you to do it with me, and if I act capable, you won't!'
 
I think the motivation comes from my confidence in the child's abilities and the promise  they aren't alone in facing challenges.

If We Can Learn Why Our Children Say, 'No" and What They Need Like:

1. They want contact with us
2. They want us to boost to their confidence
3. They want to do something more interesting 
4. They prefer to do something else
5. They fear failure

we can solve the problem and help them want to try.

One more thing, intrinsic motivation always trumps external incentive in the long run! That is how I see it"  ~ Hazel W.

Hazel did a fine job in helping us understand why kids give up. She gave solutions too. Asking questions, pulling away from the situation to take the focus off the child, and assuring them of help if they still can't do it when she comes back.

Her goal is to build confidence by believing in her kids' abilities. And with older kids, she discusses the motivation problems they are having.

Would You Please Add to Hazel's Ideas for Motivating Kids?  

If you do, I'll email you a FREE Copy of my list for 21 of the Best Learning Toys for Kids from Birth to 12. How? Just leave your comment about Raising Motivated Kids in the comment link below and I'll email you your FREE copy. Be sure to leave your name and email address to make sure I email it to you before the holidays. 

With warm wishes,

Jean Tracy, MSS

One more thing:

Join our Parenting Skills Blog at http://www.ParentingSkillsBlog.com and receive FREE
"Motivation~33 Expert Ways to Motivate Your Kids"


Motivation ~ How These 2 Parents Use Positive Encouragement to Motivate Their Kids

Parents who use postive motivation to encourage their kids to try, help their kids learn, grow, and build character. Here are two different mothers with two different motivation tips.

First Parenting Tip for Encouraging Kids and Building Character:

"I think motivation is very important. Letting a child know that they can try something new and if it doesn't work they still, at least, had a chance to try it out. And now they can go on to something else. It's all a part of life." Cherylann  B

I like this mother's attitude. She gives her child the experience of trying something new. She doesn't insist or force her child. She allows her to choose something else if it doesn't work out. She says, "It's just a part of life."

Second Parenting Tip for Encouraging Kids and Building Character:

"Encouragement - when my son gets disappointed that he cannot do something, I tell him "Yes you can." He says, "No I can't." I say "If at first you don't succeed, try, try, and try again". Then I show him how it can be done. I act excited about it too. This motivates him to try." Amom2

I like how this mom encourages her discouraged son. She let's him know she believes in him. She gives him a special quote to motivate him. Then she shows him how to do it. She does it with excitement.

What Do You Think about These 2 Motivating Tips?

Get a FREE Copy of my list for 21 of the Best Learning Toys for Kids from Birth to 12. How? Just leave your comment about Raising Motivated Kids in the comment link below and I'll email you your FREE copy. Be sure to leave your name and email address to make sure I can send it to your email. 

With warm wishes,

Jean Tracy, MSS

One more thing:

Join our Parenting Skills Blog at http://www.ParentingSkillsBlog.com and receive FREE
"Motivation~33 Expert Ways to Motivate Your Kids"


Motivation ~ How This Parent Motivates Kids by Setting Goals Together

We want to raise motivated kids. We want them to achieve the goals we set for them. What's wrong with that? Plenty! Let's find out why from this mom and what she did about it.

"I believe that the strongest motivator when setting goals is the "buy in". What I mean by that is who's goal is it that your child is achieving? 

I found through much trial and error, that the goals my children failed to achieve were the ones I or someone else set for them. When we learned to communicate and set goals together, they were much more likely to succeed because they were passionate and could visualize the results.

It has also made them much more goal oriented because they have felt the effects of both achieving and failing at something they set their mind on.

When they failed at something I put out there for them... They didn't take ownership or accountability because " it wasn't their idea anyway!".

When they hit an obstacle on the path to their own goal. They were more creative in finding a way around it...and prouder of themselves when they accomplished it." Posted by Tara Kennedy-Kline

Do you like this mom's "buy in" idea? Have you ever been expected to achieve a goal that someone set for you? Have you ever rebelled because you didn't "buy in" to the goal?

This mom sits down with her kids and teaches them how to set the goals they want to achieve. She found they:

1. Could visualize their goal.

2. Took responsibility for their goal.

3. Became passionate about achieving their goal.

4. Found solutions to the obstacles to their goal.

5. Felt proud when they achieved their goal.

Let us know what you think about Tara's motivation ideas in the comment link below.

A Special Gift for You!

Parents, when holidays, birthdays, and special occasions are near, buy toys that teach, entertain, and last. If you're tired of wasting money on toys that break:

Get a FREE Copy of 21 of the Best Learning Toys for Kids. How? Just leave your comment about Raising Motivated Kids in the comment link below and I'll email you your FREE copy. Be sure to leave your name and email address. 

With warm wishes,

Jean Tracy, MSS

One more thing:

Join our Parenting Skills Blog at http://www.ParentingSkillsBlog.com and receive FREE
"Motivation~33 Expert Ways to Motivate Your Kids"


Motivation ~ This Parent Motivates His Kids with Money!

Motivating kids with money is a crime. Kids should do chores, schoolwork, and responsibilites freely as members of the family. But is there another side to using money to motivate your kids? Could it build character too?

Why This Father Uses Money to Motivate His Kids:

"Some will throw rocks at me for this motivation method - money. I paid $1 for each day they attended martial arts training - which often amounted to $5 per week, $20/month, which was a lot of money for them while they were younger.

I do not overdo it, but I do use a financial "bribe" occasionally to get them moving ahead. What do they learn from it? They learn that if you do the right thing, you get rewarded with something that you really want." E.G. Sebastian

What's Good about Motivating Kids with Money?

1. Bribes are used to get kids to do something wrong. This dad uses money to help his kids do something good.

2. Using money to get kids do everything motivates kids to expect money or they won't do their part. This dad uses money only "occasionally."

3. Money can teach kids to save for what they really want which is a good thing and builds character. This is why this dad rewards his kids with money "occasionally."

Let us know what you think about Mr. Sebastian's motivation idea?

My Gift to You!

Parents, when holidays, birthdays, and special occasions are near, buy toys that teach, entertain, and last. If you're tired of wasting money on toys that break:

Get a Free Copy of 21 of the Best Learning Toys for Kids. How? Just leave your comment about Raising Motivated Kids in the comment link below and I'll email you your FREE copy. Be sure to include you email address and first name.

With warm wishes,

Jean Tracy, MSS

One more thing:

Join our Parenting Skills Blog at http://www.ParentingSkillsBlog.com and receive FREE
"Motivation~33 Expert Ways to Motivate Your Kids"