If you're a parent and like taking quizzes, find out if you're helping your child succeed today. Our parenting expert and author, Carol Josel, has devised a test called Honestly Speaking from her book Other-Wise and School-Wise. You'll fine 9 questions to answer and 4 quotes to help your children succeed. This is an excerpt from her parenting guidebook.
Parents often feel compelled to step in to ensure our children's success, trying to protect them from failure and a loss of self-esteem. You too? Check off those items that hold true for you and then read on for tips and quotes to keep you on the right path.
1. I sometimes praise my child for the very slightest reason.
2. I have, as least once, called my child's teacher to make excuses for my child's poor showing on a test or assignment.
3. At least once, I've requested that my child be retested to improve a grade.
4. I discourage my child's risk-taking. Why court disaster?
5. I'd do just about anything to help my child feel good about him/herself.
6. I've at least once typed a paper, done an assignment, or helped my child complete a project for a good grade.
7. I don't hesitate to question a teacher if my child has been disciplined. He/she is a good kid and not a behavior problem.
8. I'd consider calling a teacher and refuse to let my child serve detention. If my kid says he/she is blameless, that's enough for me.
9. I believe that teachers should offer extra credit and bonus points to bolster a child's grades.
Checking off more than even one or two of these items suggests that instead of bolstering self-esteem, you may actually be undermining it. Read on to find out why...
Not To Be Avoided!
You know that success is sweet--and it's what we want for our children! Yet, at the same time, we must understand that self-esteem comes from overcoming obstacles, hard work, and, yes, even failure. Protecting our children from consequences undermines effort, independent thinking, and the ability to cope. Here's why... (From pages 57-58)
Quotes for Parents from Experts
. "When we muffle our children in a haze of supportive words and blunt their experience of consequences, we could be making it harder for them to deal with the real world." ~ Melissa Fay Greene
. "I've noticed this trend a lot lately: adults refusing to let children fail at something. It's as if we grown-ups believe that kids are too fragile to handle defeat." ~ Suzanne Sievert
. "Parents get overly involved in the minutiae of their kids' lives, stage-managing successes and robbing kids of the opportunity to learn from their failures." ~ Pat Wingert and Barbara Kantrowitz
. "Help your kids see mistakes and failures as temporary setbacks instead of excuses to quit." ~ Michele Borba, Ed.D.
Reminder: Babe Ruth struck out 1,330 times and hit 714 homeruns!!! (From page 58)
If you failed the quiz, don't worry. Use the expert quotes to remind you that children must experience the pain of failure to know the sweet taste of success.
Carol Josel is the 'Parent's Expert.' As a long-time educator, she understands how parents want to protect their children. She also knows that over-protection won't turn kids from failure to success and self-esteem.
Pick up Other-Wise and School-Wise: A Parent Guidebook to learn the best ways to help your child succeed.
Available at: Amazon.com
Let's APPLAUD Carol Josel for sharing her wisdom with us. She offers us the opportunity to be the best parents ever.
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