"There's Something about Love that Builds Up and Is Creative."

Martin Luther King, Jr. wanted his four little children (and all people) judged by the "content of their character," not "the color of their skin." Dr. King believed in love not hate. Find out how character, judgment and love fit together in a way Dr. King might approve.

Effective parents teach children to judge. Not by skin color but by searching for the good.

Today, I’ll share how this love works through the story of Gabby, a family activity, and an activity that increases others’ self-esteem. It creates friendships too.

Practice it in your home. I guarantee it will boost your family’s love. Then watch it spread outward from your family to others.

 

Dad, I like how you take the time to play UNO with me.

How Kids Judge Others by the "Content of Their Character"

Dr. King was right. "There is something about love that builds up and is creative." 

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Jean Tracy

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Don't Let Your Bashful Child Be Lonely!

Timid kids feel pain. Parents watch and suffer. Loneliness wins.

Imagine your child sitting alone in the lunchroom thinking,

“No one will sit with me. Nobody likes me.”

What does she feel? Does she rush to the bathroom and hide until classes start again?

Bashful kids don’t have to be friendless. You can help. There is a 3-part blueprint that works.

Go slow. Keep the steps small. Why? Because shy kids are overwhelmed by fearful thoughts and feelings. Big leaps don’t work.

3 Don’ts for Overcoming Shyness

1. Don’t speak up for your children because they’ll lose the chance to speak up for themselves.
2. Don’t make excuses for your children because they’ll rely on those excuses and not try.
3. Don’t put your children down for being shy because your comments will add to their misery.

3 Do’s for Helping Shy Kids Make Friends

1. Do ask if they’d like to make friends because you want to know if they’ll cooperate.
2. Do ask, “What stops you from making friends?" because the answer is important and will help you guide them with the blueprint.
3. Do tell them that making friends is a skill they can learn because it will give them the hope they need.

 

A Few Friends Can Make a Big Difference.

Shy kids need your patience because impatience shuts them down. Remember, even tiny steps require taking risks. Your children may never become an outgoing extrovert or big talker. But, with your help, they can overcome loneliness and satisfy their need for a few close friends.   

Pick up the Blueprint by inserting the code, SPEAK UP at:

KidsDiscuss.com

Or

https://www.KidsDiscuss.com

You may also like my kindle book for kids with stories and 75 real tips for creating friendships at: Amazon.com

 

Friendships Bring Happiness to Kids

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Don't Let the Big Bad Bully

Torment Your Child

Big Bad Bullies are Critical Judges. They mess with your child's mind. Their constant put-downs harm self-esteem and prevent their victims from liking themselves. 

 

Jack Canfield & Miriam Laundry

In this brand new book, Miriam Laundry teams up with Chicken Soup for the Soul Expert, Jack Canfield. Together they share the story of a girl tormented by a big bad bully who haunted her every move.

One day she found the bully in the school bathroom. Did she stand up to the bully? Or did she run away "like a scared little chicken?" 

In the end, your child will learn a method for dealing with the big bad bully. 

What My 12 Year-Old Granddaughter Thought:

 

Allyssa

"It tricked me and I thought it was a real girl who was being bullied and I could relate to it. It turned out it was herself and she was her own worst critic. I criticize myself a lot and it turns out nobody is actually paying attention to what I'm insecure about. I'm going to start doing the author's The Positive Mirror Exercise. I think it's going to help me a lot."

Suggestion for Parents:

I suggest you read this beautifully illustrated book with your child. Discuss  and practice The Positive Mirror Exercise together. You'll find 5 other exercises for helping her conquer the bully.  

Don't let your child's self-esteem prevent her from liking herself. Pick up this book at Amazon.com now. It will make a great birthday, Christmas, Hanukkah, or 'just because' present.

The Big Bad Bully

https://www.amazon.com/Big-Bad-Bully-Jack-Canfield/dp/0757323081

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The Aggressive Child Lacks Friends

 

Aggressive kids, like Joey aren't liked. He hated waiting in line at the water fountain. He'd shove the kids lined up ahead of him. They'd fall forward like dominoes. The first child always hit his face while drinking. Joey laughed. I visited his parents and had a glimpse into Joey's life at home. 

The father put his wife down several times during our conversation. She looked straight into my eyes but said nothing. Tears ran down her face.

When parents model meanness, children pick it up. Joey was mean. He didn't know how to relate to others.

I found out that Joey's dad was too busy to spend time with Joey. Joey didn't feel important. He didn't feel love from his dad. As we ended the meeting, Joey's father promised to spend time with him. He and his wife decided to work on their relationship too.

Teaching children how to assert themselves, speak up with respect, and be friendly starts at home. Parents must model how to communicate well. If they don't know how, they can learn. The following article will show how.

 Assertive Children  - How Parents Raise Great Communicators

You'll find:

1. An empowering formula for teaching kids assertiveness skills

2. 5 assertive role-plays to practice at the dinner table

3. A fun family activity 

4. An assertive poem for kids

How Joey Became Assertive

Joey told me with a big smile that his dad playfully put shaving cream on his face and let him shave it off with an empty razor. It made a real difference. Joey, over a matter of weeks, stopped shoving kids and started making friends. A greater respect developed between Joey's parents. Soon they were ready to learn the Assertiveness Formula within this article:

Assertive Children  - How Parents Raise Great Communicators

 

Loving Parents Empower Kids

You can raise assertive children by practicing the formula within your family. Advise your kids to use it with others too. If you do, they'll learn to speak up for themselves, make friends, and become respectful communicators too.

Watch our brief video on assertiveness:

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2 Conversations Can Help Your Kids

Develop Successful Attitudes.

ENVISION YOUR CHILD’S ACCOMPLISHMENTS HELPED BY 9 NEW MOTIVATING IDEAS.  You can plant those ideas with 2 conversations about positive attitudes.

First Conversation - Your Child's Inner Self-Talk

Just like you, children everywhere have conversations in their heads. Their inner conversations can sow seeds of discouragement, “I never do anything right,” or sprout growth, “I love learning new things.” Let's find out how to turn their internal chats into positive mottoes.

Second Conversation - Your Parent/Child Discussions

Talk with your child about the power of positive thinking and the importance about being curious. Let her know that her outlook will greatly determine whether she succeeds or fails. Why? Because the thoughts in her head influence her feelings and become self-fulfilling prophecies. Discuss how she can become a successful thinker  by sharing the 9 self-talk sayings in this parenting gift.

 

It's Never to Early to Talk about Attitudes

Ask your children which saying is best one for repeating often. Better yet see if they can create a self-fulfilling one-liner of their own. Rhymes are easier to remember. Post the one that fits best.

Great posting places include the fridge, a bulletin board, a bedroom door and a bathroom mirror.

 

Posting Positive Attitudes

Become Eye-Candy Reminders

Be sure to save these 9 curiosity mottoes in your 3-hole binder. Revisit them whenever you need to discuss motivation with your child.

Enter Code:  CURIOSITY at https://www.KidsDiscuss.com  

Download Your Parenting Gift Now

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Creating and Achieving Goals with Rhymes

that Motivate Kids

POSITIVE RHYMES MOTIVATE KIDS. Repetition recirculates them in their memories and becomes well-traveled paths in their brains. 

I remember a quote from 5th grade when our class was learning about explorers, "If at first you don't succeed, try try again." That became a lifelong slogan for me. It helped me motor (although slowly) through many a tough math class.

When a motivating rhyme is catchy and appeals to your child , suggest creating a bookmark, a poster, or a sticky note of it. It might become a well-traveled path and a lifelong motivator too.

In today's one-minute video you and your child will hear 5 rhymes that appeal to the senses. Feel free to tell your child to use his favorite one often. He could also use it as a springboard to creating his own one-line poem.

Want a copy of the 5 rhymes? Just Enter Code - SENSES at https://www.KidsDiscuss.com and it's yours to download.

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DR. SEUSS MOTIVATED KIDS. Parents, by asking children the right questions, you can motivate them too. Knowing the best questions is the subject of this gift.

Imagine your child giving up. You've tried everything to encourage your child. You've even:

1. Bribed him with expensive rewards.
2. Lectured her about not getting into college.
3. Threatened him with punishment.
4. Ignored her discouragement.
5. Yelled at him.

• Bribing might work for a few weeks. But, if bringing their grades up takes a few months, many children will give up. Besides do you really want to be a briber?  If you do, you might have to bribe your kids for everything.  That means only big external rewards will get them to perform. The important internal rewards like satisfaction, curiosity, and excitement could be lost.
• Lecturing about college and getting a good job, like bribing, doesn't motivate because it's too far into the future.
• Punishment may make them rebel.
• Ignoring their discouragement may give them the idea, 'Mom doesn't care so it doesn't matter.'
• Yelling, like punishment, will probably backfire.

But there are better ways to motivate your child.

 

Ask Motivating Questions

Pick up today's handout with its 7 questions. Keep it handy. When your child needs encouragement, choose the best question for that moment.  Be an investigator, listen well, use empathy if appropriate, and be consistent.

To get your gift, go to www.KidsDiscuss.com and enter the word code:

ASK

and download your 7 motivating questions.

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 Successful Kids Try

DOES YOUR CHILD COMPLAIN, “I can’t,” or “It’s too hard?” If you’d like to motivate him, check the strategies inside this parenting gift. Find the ones you can start using today.

If your daughter has a long habit of negative self-talk, you’ll need to repeat the methods often to remind her that she can succeed.

Should you be an optimistic parent, you may have an easier time helping your child become positive like yourself. Why? Positive people attract. They tend to be magnetic because they share a hopeful energy that others like to be near. That’s why they are successful. As long as you don't overdue it, your positive style will attract your child too.

Negative parents repel.

In today’s parenting gift, you'll find ideas for boosting your child’s:

1. Efforts
2. Imagination
3. Goals
4. Self-pride
5. Self-talk

Getting A’s must not be what success is about. Why? Because sooner or later even the very bright child will fail at something. The fear of failing could slow down his desire to try. The risk is just too great.

But risk is the key to succeeding. Risk is about effort, grit, and the willingness to stick one's neck out.

Please download this gift and, if you don’t need it immediately, add it to your 3-hole binder for future reference. You never know which idea you might need for raising your successful child.

Go to KidsDiscuss.com and Insert the code word for Subscriber Gifts: SUCCESS

Then download your subscriber gift.

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Motivating Your Child Is Easy

CHILDREN LEARN THROUGH THEIR SENSES. Seeing, hearing, smelling, tasting, and touching are built-in learning gifts. Parents CAN encourage kids to gain knowledge with sense-based compliments. Today, you’ll find several ways to encourage your child’s efforts to expand their intelligence. 

Your Children Feel Great with Loving Touches

Perhaps you want to teach your child kindness. His sense of touch could come alive with a pat on the back, a hug, a kiss, or a hand squeeze. When you notice a caring behavior, you could say something like, “I appreciate how you let your brother play video games with the older kids.” A pat on the back might be the perfect touch.

Your Kids Learn through Tasty Foods and Delicious Smells

Consider promoting your child’s cooking skills. Let’s say she decides to bake chocolate chip cookies. She’ll learn to read recipes and measure ingredients. You could inspire further cooking by saying, “Your cookies taste as good as they smell.” A warm cookie with a glass of milk could further her desire to learn new recipes.

Children Smile When They See Their Work

Refrigerators and kitchen bulletin boards are super places to post their masterpieces. Art work, school work, even a photo of a bed well-made can motivate them to keep on trying. Your comments like, “How did you challenge yourself to write such an interesting report,” encourages them further.

Kids Love to Hear Special Sounds

 

Use Her Sense of Sound to Motivate Her

Perhaps your child enjoys baseball and made a difficult catch. Your words like, “How did it feel when you caught the fly and threw it to third base for a double out?” puts her back in those moments when the crowd was cheering. Because of your praise and the crowd’s roars, she’s likely to practice catching and throwing even more.

For more ideas using the senses to motivate your child, go to:

How Parents Motivate Kids Through Their Senses

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Children Love to Give Their Opinions

MANY PARENTS ARE NOT BORN COMMUNICATORS. They love their children but don't know how to talk to their kids. Over-talking turns kids off. Interrupting, sarcasm, and being too busy create a distance between parents and children.

Simple meaty questions and listening well open the door to good conversations. You don't have to do much. If your kids sense you're truly interested in what they think, even if they know you disagree, they'll talk. This means arguing to get them to change their minds is out. But you can ask more questions to get them to think deeper about a subject. And when they're done, you can share some thoughts of your own.

Today's parenting gift includes conversation starters for family dinners, car rides, and bedside chats. Some examples of starters could include:

1. What makes a good person? Why?
2. Would you like to be famous? Why?
3. Should kids have chores? Why?

Listening well takes patience because you might not like what you hear. But if you cut in and correct, you risk not finding out how your child really thinks. Why? Because your child may shut down and not talk. Then how can you guide your child to better thoughts?

Feel free to cut today's parenting bonus into ten questions. Put them in an envelope and pull out when you'd like to have an interesting conversation with your child.

Click - 10 Conversation Starters for a Loving Family

https://www.kidsdiscuss.com/subscriber-gifts.asp

Insert Code Word: Conversation  and download gift.

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