The Passive-Aggressive Child - 5 Practical Parenting Solutions

Boy Passive Agg 624
 
You Can Turn Your Passive-Aggressive Child into a
Pleasant Person
 

Passive-aggressiveness in children is like a fallen tree blocking the road to good communication. They can be unpleasant, demanding, and controlling.

They express negative emotions indirectly without:

  1. Saying what's bothering them.
  2. Sharing what they feel.
  3. Expressing what they want.

What cuts a path through this communication roadblock?

Parenting Solutions are Found in Our New Article 

You'll find 5 parenting tips with the exact information you need. The easy step-by-step instructions will help you:

  1. Determine where the passive-aggressiveness is coming from. 
  2. Decide what to say. 
  3. Get your child to reflect on better communication.
  4. Teach the Good Communication Formula.
  5. Use this this activity to practice the formula.

This Communication Formula Will Help If:

  • You're fed up with the smirks, the sass, and the snickering
  • You're feeling contradicted, confused, or controlled 
  • You're experiencing opposition, manipulation, or disrespect

Use the suggestions in this article. Get the respect you deserve. Connect with the child you love.

 

6876904_young-angry-woman-holding-her-head 900
 
Parents Who Accept Disrespect
Feel Like This

 

This Direct  Communication Formula Helps Your Child:

  1. Speak calmly and directly about the problem,
  2. Share his feelings honestly, 
  3. Express the solution he would like.

Cut through the passive-aggressive roadblock. Teach your child this communication formula. Create the loving relationship you want.  

Indian-father-and-son 530
 
Teach the Skills and Enjoy Your
Child

Get your answers here:

Parenting the Passive-Aggressive Child - 5 Practical Solutions

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With warm wishes, 

Jean Tracy, MSS

******

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How to Turn Your Moody Kids into Happy Children

 

 

Moody
 
How Moody Kids Become Happy Children

 

Your sulking child won’t talk. You ask yourself:

  1. Is she mad at me for saying, ‘No.”
  2. Did her brother tease her about the pimple on her chin?
  3. Has her best friend dumped her for a new girlfriend?

You can torture yourself or not.

Choose to teach your child good communication skills instead. Skills that help her talk about her problems before painful thoughts grip her mind.

Recycling resentment, hurt, fear, blame, and sadness can become your child’s lifelong habit. Recycling negative thoughts hurts. Talking about problems and solving them feels good.

The following solutions are for both girls and boys.

3 Ways to Rescue Kids from Moodiness

Black Dad Discussing with son
 
Listening Helps Kids Share Their Feelings

 

      1.Listening

        Good listening by parents builds trust. When children trust parents will hear their problems without arguing or criticizing, they talk.

        It takes many talks to teach children the communication skills they need. By listening well, parents are teaching good communication. Kids will learn to listen in return.

        Find a sample parent/child conversation that’s easy to use at Listening Chats.

  1. Repeating Motivational Sayings
Asian Mom and Daughter
 
Repeating Positive Sayings Motivates Kids

 

        Teach children through repetition. Use motivational thoughts for your child to absorb. Here are a few:

           “The most beautiful smile belongs to those who make others smile” Mahnoor Tahir

          “The secret of getting ahead is getting started.”  Mark Twain.         

          “The best sleeping pill is a clear conscience.” Dada J. P. Vaswani

Repeating upbeat motivational quotes helps your child remember them. They become her inner self-talk.

Get 5 more quotes that my mother used to motivate me. I passed them on to my children too. Family Sayings.

  1. Creating a Fun Home-life
Dad and Son Guitar 624
 
Family Music Night

 

  •  Once a week have a ‘Family Compliment Night.’
  •  Help kids ‘Write a Newsletter’ for your expanded family.
  • Each night Discuss One Act of Kindness each member did that day.

Pick up 5 more fun events for your family at Bright Attitudes

Conclusion: How to Help Your Moody Child

  1. Use conversations to teach good communication skills that solve problems.
  2. Repeat motivational quotes for kids to absorb.
  3. Put fun events into your family life.

For more in depth ideas go to:

How Parents Turn Dark Moods into Bright Attitudes

 

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Thank you so much.

With warm wishes, 

Jean Tracy, MSS

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Invitations - How Diverse Families Make Friends

 

 

Interracial Families 800
 
How Diverse Families Make Friends

 

Our Melting Pot Culture is filled with racial and ethnic treasures. When we extend a hand in friendship to one another, opportunities flow-in. But it can be scary.

Cross Cultural Invitations

A Handshake Woman 461
 
Extend a Hand with an Invite

 

Making friends can be risky.

Don’t be shy. Just be frisky,

Smile kindly big and bright.

Extend your hand with an invite,

That crosses cultures and you will see,

Your new friend is filled with glee.

Once that door is open, barriers can be overcome, friendships can begin, and appreciation for our sameness and differences can blossom.

Friendship Ice Breakers 

Girl Flowers
 
Invite Friendships with Flowers

Everyone is responsible to extend a hand in friendship. There are fun and easy ways to break the ice with invitations like:

  1. A neighborhood party
  2. A plate of cookies
  3. A bouquet of flowers
  4. More Invitations Ideas

Racially Diverse Friendships Enrich Us When We:

Hikers 450
 
Arrange Neighborhood Sports 

 

  1. Teach each other our languages
  2. Exchange specialty recipes
  3. Share family traditions
  4. Play board games
  5. Eat dinners at each other’s home
  6. Organize potluck dinner parties
  7. More Cultural Enrichment Ideas

All these ways and more help us love our neighbors as treasures. We grow and they grow.

For more ideas on how to connect with others go to:

Diverse Friendships - How Families Come Together

 
Diverse Heart 450
 
Loving Each Other As Treasures

 

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How Routines Help Parents Raise Successful Kids

Disorganized Boy 900
 
Disorganized Kids Need Routines

 

A disorganized child lacks the inner self-discipline needed for solid learning. A youngster who lives in a chaotic home may feel scattered and have trouble focusing. A daily routine at home can help.

Attention Span – The Boy Who Couldn’t Concentrate

Years before I became a child and family counselor, I taught school. Ricky sat in the back of my second grade class of fifty students. He played with toys, teased kids near him, and day-dreamed. My efforts in the classroom were not enough to focus him. The school lacked important resources like counseling.

In addition, Ricky came from a chaotic home. Breakfast, dinner, family time, chores and a set time for homework didn’t exist. Ricky fended for himself.

His mother said, “I’m tired of mothering.” Ricky was the youngest of several children.

Ricky’s noisy home-life needed a daily schedule because children succeed best with predictable routines. Without them, kids often feel insecure, uncertain, and mentally scattered. 

Disorganized Children - How to Develop a Homework Routine

Help your child focus and succeed in school. You’ll find lot’s of ideas including parenting guidelines for rewards, consequences, and even a contract to help your child become more organized and successful. It's a FREE  slide share. Just click on each slide.

 

How Parents Help Disorganized Kids Focus and Succeed

Boy at Desk 900
 
Organized Kids Focus and Succeed

 

You may also like these videos:

6 Ways to Help Your Child Concentrate

and

Smart Kids – 6 Intelligent Question for Smart Brains

 

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Thank you so much.

With warm wishes, 

Jean Tracy, MSS

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6 Parenting Tips that Prepare Kids to Be Smarter in School

Brain Power 800
 
How Parents Can Motivate Kids with Good Questions

 

It’s not difficult to raise smarter children. But many parents use the wrong tactics. They don’t know praising kids for goods grades and criticizing them for poor grades can backfire.

 

Why Praise and Criticism Often Fail

Research says many kids want praise so much that they limit themselves to easier tasks. Why? Because they know they’ll succeed. It’s not the way to expand their brain power.

Criticizing kids for poor grades can increase their low self-esteem, fire up their resentment, and convince them to give up.

Kids need to know that their brains grow with deeper thinking, solving problems, studying well. Don’t let them think, “I can’t get it. I’m not smart.”

Smarter Kids Mom and Son
 
"You challenged yourself and figured it out!"

 

 

How Parents Can Prepare Kids for School

Want to increase your child’s brain power? Today's slide share includes 6 smart attitudes to promote, 6 smart questions to ask, and 6 slogans for motivating kids.

Praising kids for good grades is not as effective as asking the right questions to increase your child’s love of learning. When your children feel good about their thinking skills, see learning as a positive challenge, and develop a determination to keep trying, their brains grow. Use these simple fun solutions for promoting smart brains in your children.

One more thing, these questions can be used for kids sports, music lessons, chores and more.

 

Smart Black Child
 
"I solved a hard problem and my brain got smarter!"

 

Click on This Slide Share:

 

Brain Power for Kids: 6 Powerful Parenting Tips

https://www.kidsdiscuss.com/#/slide-share-detail/Brain-Power-for-Kids:-6-Powerful-Parenting-Tips

 

You might also like this video: Smart Kids - 6 Intelligent Questions for Smart Brains 

 

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Thank you so much.

With warm wishes, 

Jean Tracy, MSS

******

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Stop the Tattling! 6 Positive Parenting Solutions - 7 Helpful Examples

Frustrated Mom 893
 
You Can't Plug Your Ears to Tattletales.

 

Frustrated parents dread tattling. The squeals from crying kids disturb peace, upset nerves, and demand attention.

You can’t plug your ears and hope it will go away. You must act. But how?

Today’s Slide Share Offers You:

  • The best question to ask tattlers
  • 6 tips parents can easily use
  • 7 examples that teach kids the difference between tattling and telling

What Tattletale Kids Need to Know:

  1. The purpose of tattling is to get someone in trouble.
  2. The purpose of telling is to help someone in trouble.
  3. Parents don't like tattling. They do like telling.
  4. Kids can solve problems with the right assertiveness tools from parents. See video below.

How Parents Teach Kids The Difference Between Tattling and Telling:

You can give them discussion dilemmas and ask, “Is this tattling or telling?” Here are a few you can use right now.

 

Boy Student
 
Is This Tattling or Telling?

 

  1. Logan’s not playing fair.
  2. Harper got stung by a bee.
  3. Mia’s making fun of me.
  4. Aiden tore up my homework.
  5. Sofia called me a name.
  6. Luke was hit by a rock.
  7. Zoey’s mocking me.
  8. Jack called me a liar.
  9. Sam stole money from grandma’s purse.

Discuss each situation. Find out how your child thinks. If he is wrong, tell him, “I need to know when someone is hurt, in danger, needs help, or did something serious like stealing.”

“But if it’s a squabble between you and the other person, do your best to solve it. Then come and tell me how you did it. I’d like to hear your solution."

You don’t have to plug your ears. You do need to act because your children need to learn the difference between tattling and telling. They need to learn how to solve their tattling problems too.

Your Tattling Slide Share Tips:

For the 6 parenting tips and 7 new examples of tattling or telling go to Stop The Tattling - 6 Positive Parenting Solutions The pictures will help your child decide. 

 

 

Frustrated Mom SlideShare
 
You CAN Stop the Tattling!

 

 

You might also like this video because it give kids tools for solving their squabbles:

How Parents Teach Assertiveness Skills to Kids

 

 

To refresh the 7 tips for listening to your child's solutions:

These 7 Tips Turn Tattletales into Problem-Solvers

 

Listening 800 H
 
Listen to Your Child's Solutions. It's Rewarding!

 

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Thank you so much.

With warm wishes, 

Jean Tracy, MSS

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These 7 Parenting Questions Turn Tattletales into Problem-Solvers - Video Included

Listening 800 H
 
Listening Is the Key to Stopping the Tattling

 

Parents yell, “Stop Tattling!”

Listening to tattling is like scratching a swollen mosquito bite. If you listen to it over and over, it will get worse. Tattling becomes your child’s  habit.  Screaming becomes your cure, but only for the moment.

There is a better way. Today we’ll show a video to stop the tattling. You’ll see within the video a father who asks his daughter,

“Are you trying to help or hurt your sister?”

If she’s tattling to get her sister in trouble, he tells her:

“Please try to solve the problem yourself. Then come back and tell me how you solved it.”

Two Parenting Goals for Problem-Solving

  1. To increase problem-solving with your positive attention.
  2. To decrease tattling.
Daughter Listening 900
 
Listening Is the Gift Your Child Wants

 

The Problem-Solving Gift

Imagine you’re the girl’s father. When she returns to share her solution, listen. Good listening is a hug without words. It is filled with your attention. It is peaceful and loving. It is your gift to her.

How Listening Shows Caring:

Good listening avoids judging or arguing. It really wants to know your child’s thoughts and feelings. If there is something you don’t understand, ask questions after she’s done speaking.

Here is what you might say when your child shares her solution:

  1. Let’s talk about your solution.
  2. What voice did you use and what did you say?
  3. How did it end?
  4. How did you feel after you solved it?
  5. What do you need to do to avoid a conflict next time?
  6. What do you think of your becoming a problem-solver?
  7. Can you guess how proud I am of you?

In the end, you want your child to be able to say, “ You really listened. You really care about how I think.”

Listening is a gift that can be used over and over in many different situations, not just tattling. Why? Because listening with love is what your child wants.  It creates a bond with your child and harmony in your home. Yes, it takes more time and it is rewarding. It is a great way to teach problem-solving. 

This brief video shares more ways to stop the tattling: 

Tattletale Kids: 10 Tips for Frustrated Parents

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w4Z3fh0VzRw

 

 

You might also like this article:

How Parents Stop Kids from Tattling on Sibs

https://www.kidsdiscuss.com/#/article/206

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Thank you so much.

With warm wishes, 

Jean Tracy, MSS

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Locked-Down Parents with Tattletale Kids - Here's Help

Frustrated Momma 450

Is your tattletale kid driving you crazy? Do you know why your child tattles? Today, we will share 4 big reasons kids snitch, 3 important questions to ask, and simple ways to stop the tattling and keep your sanity.

Some Reasons for Tattling Behavior:

  1. Attention
  2. Power
  3. Revenge
  4. Pity

Kids tattle on brothers and sisters because they want your attention and approval. Some children want power over a younger child. Others want to get back at a sibling. Younger kids want your pity and hugs. They all want you to take their side. 

Jackie Little Bobby 450
 
When They Tattle, What Will You Do?

 

Advice and Answers: What Parents Need to Teach Kids Who Tattle

Children need to know the difference between helping and hurting. Helping siblings who have a serious problem or are in danger needs a parent’s attention. It is not tattling when kids tell parents about danger.

Tattling hurts because its goal is to get a sister or brother in trouble. Tattling prompts parents to yell in frustration. When that happens, the tattling problem does not get solved and bad feelings linger within the family.

Teaching kids to help their siblings and not hurt them has tons of benefits. Children learn to play well together. Laughter and cooperation grow. The family atmosphere is pleasant.

Read More

Find out the 3 important questions parents must ask themselves and 4 typical examples of kids tattling with simple ways to solve each situation.

How Parents Stop Kids from Tattling on 'Sibs.'  

Father Daughter Talk 2 450
 
Are You Tattling to Help or Hurt?

 

Read Now:  How Parents Stop Kids from Tattling on 'Sibs.'  

 

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Jean Tracy, MSS

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The Virus - How Parents Calm Children in 9 Easy Steps

Scientist 800
 
This Drawing Technique Helps Kids Overcome Fear

 

The coronavirus scares your child.

“Mom, are we safe?”

“What do you mean?”

“Will we get sick too?”

Disaster news is everywhere. TV, newspapers, social media and even billboard reminders are appearing in some places.

Children are home. Parents are home. Everyone is scared.

Today's 3 Practical Parenting Steps:

  1. Review the 9 listening skills.
  2. Learn the drawing technique by using it to calm yourself first.
  3. Teach the drawing technique to your child. 

 

9 Listening Skills Effective Parents Need

Review the following listening tips:

  1. Listen with direct eye contact, a caring smile and both ears.
  2. Ask questions to be sure you understand.
  3. Be patient. Give enough time for your child to form thoughts.
  4. Repeat your child's ideas in your own words. Follow up with, “Is that correct?”
  5. Encourage continued sharing by saying, “Tell me more.”
  6. Walk in your child's shoes. With empathy try to feel what he’s feeling.
  7. Avoid interrupting or jumping to conclusions. Listen to the end.
  8. Share your thoughts after your child's finished..
  9. Begin by reflecting feelings. “It sounds like you’re (upset or sad or confused, etc.).”

You Are the Best Counselor for Your Kids

Asian Mom and Daughter
 
Kids Trust Parents to Help Them

 

As a counselor for many years, I’ve used the drawing strategy below with children and adults. It works. Why? Because it's a unique way of understanding feelings, especially fears. 

When you listen well, teach practical skills and show caring, your child trusts you and feels loved. Love and trust make you the most powerful counselor of all.

9 Ways Parents Can Calm Themselves and Their Children

Dad and Son Drawing 865
 
Drawing Calms Your Kid's Anxiety

 

  1. Ask your boy or girl to, “Draw a picture of the fear.”
  2. Probe Gently: “What does your picture mean to you?”
  3. Say, “Tell me more,” several times until you hear all the anxious thoughts.
  4. Say, “Draw how you would like to feel.” Then say, “Tell me about your new picture.”
  5. Suggest, “Let's brainstorm what you could do to make your picture come true.” Wait patiently for your child’s ideas first.
  6. Say, “Write down 3 small ways you can make your positive picture come true.
  7. Say, “Pick one little step to try now." 
  8. Instruct your child, "Visualize your new picture clearly. Feel it and give it a positive title. Then post it on the fridge." Give your child all the time he or she needs.
  9.  Praise your child for calming his fear.

Discuss the second and third small steps in the following days to reinforce over time what has been learned.

Drawing an optimistic picture gives your child power over the fear. By visualizing it, feeling it and giving it a positive title, your child changes his scary mindset. Posting it on the fridge becomes a strong reminder to "stay calm and carry on." Use this technique as often as your child needs.

Consider applying it for any painful emotion your child may experience. You could even use it as a home schooling strategy.

You might like this video because it also reinforces the steps:

How Parents Help Anxious Kids Feel Confident

 

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Permissive Parenting – 3 Ways to Recapture Your Parental Authority

Permissive Parent ppt 800 (2)
 
When Permissive Parents Bribe, Kids Are The Boss

 

Permissiveness, parenting without structure and guidance, and over-negotiating rules and chores hurt your authority. Your kids are injured too. 

How Permissive Parents Harm Kids

  1. Without parental structure and direction, your kids won’t know the path to a successful life. They may follow a destructive trail and hurt themselves instead.
  2. Without parental supervision about right and wrong expect your kids to experience trouble and pain.
  3. Without responsible chores they will lack the life skills for future know-how and self-care.

How to Overcome Permissive Parenting and Take Back Your Authority

Man Mediatating ppt 624

 
Bribing Doesn't Work. Your Mind Power Does.

 

  1. Visualize yourself as a kind and firm parent with your child. (See your child not yourself.)
  2. Feel what it's like to be a kind and firm parent.
  3. Tell yourself, “I am kind and firm with my child.”

Put all 3 into one magic moment so that you see, feel, and say them all at once.

Do this before you fall asleep at night and before you rise each morning. Do this for 21 days. If you do, you’ll regain your authority and become the parent you need to be. Make it a habit.

This Kind but Firm Video Helps You Be the Authority and Your Kids Do Their Chores:

 

You Might Also Like:

Raising Responsible Kids – How to Get Your Children To Do Their Chores  It includes a 4-Point Formula.

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