Why won't this daughter listen?

Parents, who cannot listen, are the worst communicators. They cannot teach effective communication because they don’t practice it. 

Hey there! Are you someone who argues instead of listening to your child? Many parents do. Yet, listening is your most important parenting tool. Don't worry, if you decide to, you can always improve it. There are some habits you might have to brush aside before becoming a good listener.

Today I will share:

5 listening mistakes to avoid

5 simple listening habits to increase

1 simple formula for being your child's best counselor

3 fun listening activities for your family. 

5 Harmful Listening Habits to Avoid as a Parent:

Do you ever:

1. Interrupt your child?
2. Discount your child's opinions?
3. Dismiss your child's feelings?
4. Criticize your child?
5. Lecture your child?

Don't be overly concerned because here are 5 easy listening habits that you can use right now. They'll quickly improve your listening skills.

5 Listening Habits to Learn, Practice, and Model:

 

Father and Son Communicating

1. Look your child in the eye.
2. Focus on what they are saying.
3. Remember the key points.
4. Repeat those points in your words.
5. Ask questions to better understand your child.

By practicing these skills, you'll become a better listener. You'll be teaching your child good communication skills too. 

Become Your Child's Best Counselor:

Do you know why counselors are loved by their clients? It's because they are good listeners. They practice the 5 good habits. They also include the 70% Law of Communication, meaning, they listen 70% and speak 30%. As a parent, strive to speak less, listen more, and appreciate your child's thoughts and feelings. As you progress, notice how your relationship with your child strengthens. You'll become your child's best counselor too.

Here are 3 activities to make 'listening' a priority in your family: 

3 Activities for Family Listening:

1. Post a ‘Listening Habit of the Week’ on your refrigerator. Practice that habit in your home and outside your family. ‘Catch your children being good’ with a compliment when they listen well. 
2. The Morning Forecast: Tell your child, “Name something you’re looking forward to today.” The Evening Review: Ask, "What are some things you are grateful about today?"
3. Create free time each day and turn off technology. Use this time to discuss both your day and your child's day. Practice the 70% Law. 

Make 'Listening' a priority in your family. Listening Works!

Video - Short Clip - 1.11 minutes 

Sometimes pictures do speak 1,000 words. What do you think?

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With warm wishes, 

Jean Tracy

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WE CARE FOR EACH OTHER

Gossip and Looking for the Worst in Others

Meet Alexa and Tony. Both are gossipy 10 year-olds. They like bad-mouthing the kids in their 5^th grade. It helps them feel superior. 

 

"He thinks he's so cool." 

Alexa: Did you see Noah's glasses?

Tony: "So ugly!"

Alexa: “I agree.”

Tony: "Nobody likes him."

Alexa: "He thinks he so cool."

Tony: “Yah. He has the biggest house in town.”

Alexa: “They have 2 Teslas in their garage.”

Tony: "He’s so spoiled. He gets everything he wants."

Alexa: "Right! I hate hearing him brag about his video games."

Because Noah had more toys, the biggest house, and expensive cars, they felt envious. They told themselves, “I’m not spoiled like Noah. I’m better than him.” 

If looking for the worst in others become a habit, Alexa and Tony could become gossipy adults.

 Praise and Looking for the Best in Others

 

Calvin Complimenting Noah

Meet Calvin. He’s in the same 5^th grade as Alexa and Tony.

His easy laughter and friendly smiles draw kids to him. 

Noah asked Calvin to his birthday party. Noah didn’t invite Alexa and Tony. Calvin noticed that mostly adults and few classmates attended. 

“I like how you made your invitations, Noah, especially with your cat pawing the cake. Would you help me draw like you?" 

Later, Calvin asked if they could play video games.

When they finished, Calvin told Noah, “You're good at making those car racing decisions.” Everybody agreed. Noah felt like he was starting to fit in. He smiled at Calvin for helping him.

Calvin looks for the good and finds it. He shared it with Noah too.

Other students sense Calvin's positivity and want to be his friend.

If Calvin makes "looking for the good" a habit, he could become an effective leader today and in the future.

What Do You Think?

How did Alexa's and Tony’s mindsets differ from Calvin’s?

Who, in your judgment, had the better attitude?

If you chose Calvin’s attitude, check out the following Slide Share.

Dr. Martin Luther King's Dream - How Kids Pay It Forward

In this slide share you’ll find 3 ways to seek and share the good in others. And 3 ways to seek the good outside the family. My Family Compliment Weekend, a special technique, is waiting inside for you.

Watch Now!

Dr. King's Dream - How Kids Pay It Forward

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Thank you so much.

With warm wishes, 

Jean Tracy

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• 80 Fun Activities to Share with Your Kids
• 101 Ways to Get Your Children to Cooperate

 

How Diverse Families Make Friends

Our Melting Pot Culture is filled with racial and ethnic treasures. When we extend a hand in friendship to one another, opportunities flow-in. But it can be scary.

Cross Cultural Invitations

 

Extend a Hand with an Invite

Making friends can be risky.

Don’t be shy. Just be frisky,

Smile kindly big and bright.

Extend your hand with an invite,

That crosses cultures and you will see,

Your new friend is filled with glee.

Once that door is open, barriers can be overcome, friendships can begin, and appreciation for our sameness and differences can blossom.

Friendship Ice Breakers 

 

Invite Friendships with Flowers

Everyone is responsible to extend a hand in friendship. There are fun and easy ways to break the ice with invitations like:

1. A neighborhood party
2. A plate of cookies
3. A bouquet of flowers
4. More Invitations Ideas

Racially Diverse Friendships Enrich Us When We:

 

Arrange Neighborhood Sports 

1. Teach each other our languages
2. Exchange specialty recipes
3. Share family traditions
4. Play board games
5. Eat dinners at each other’s home
6. Organize potluck dinner parties
7. More Cultural Enrichment Ideas

All these ways and more help us love our neighbors as treasures. We grow and they grow.

For more ideas on how to connect with others go to:

Diverse Friendships - How Families Come Together

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Thank you so much.

With warm wishes, 

Jean Tracy, MSS

******

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How Parents Become Loving Couples

CHILDREN WANT THEIR PARENTS TO LOVE EACH OTHER. Parents want the same. But what stops some couples? Here are some possibilities:

1. Busyness
2. Distractions
3. Communication Problems
4. Disrespect
5. Money Issues
6. Lack of Time
7. Fighting
8. Stubbornness
9. Jealously

Should any of the above affect your marriage, things can get better. The 10 keys to a loving marriage come from a unique marriage counselor who thought outside the box.

Unlocking the Heart to Your

Relationship

Some of them surprised me even though they made perfect sense. They came from a era when many women were stay-at-home moms. Perhaps the advice about child care might intrigue you. 

There are suggestions about criticism, decision making, money, compromising situations with the opposite sex, physical affection, and more.

I hope you will find the 10 keys practical, modern, and needed today.

Choose the ones you like. Increase those suggestions in your daily relationship. Then see if, they unlock a happier love life for you and your spouse.

You CAN Create a Loving Marriage 

Pick up this gift by inserting the code word,

LOVE

at

https://www.KidsDiscuss.com

Download your FREE copy now!

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Thank you so much.

With warm wishes, 

Jean Tracy, MSS

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• 80 Fun Activities to Share with Your Kids
• 101 Ways to Get Your Children to Cooperate

 

Parents Can Teach  Children  to Disagree with Respect

Any parent can teach kids to be open and respectful. But it takes practice. Today we'll share:

• 9 simple rules for open-minded disagreements 
• 1 practice example about a sleepover
• A 90 second video with 5 reasons why children love confiding in you

9 Rules for Conducting Open-Minded Arguments

Have you and your child ever yelled at each other? Did you feel guilty and wish it hadn't happened? I know the feeling.

 

Respectful Disagreements Take Practice

If you're like most parents, you'll have many disagreements with your kids. Now you can turn them into opportunities for open-minded discussions. If you do, you'll be teaching your child an important life skill.

How to teach your child 9 simple rules for open-minded respectful disagreements:

1. Both speak in a calm voice.
2. Both hear and repeat each other's words or ideas.
3. Both take time to find the good points in each other's thoughts.
4. Discuss each other's good points.
5. Create a compromise in which each side wins. at least, a little. 
6. Avoid arguing, yelling, walking away, or being sarcastic.
7. If either side is disrespectful, make a future date to discuss the issue.
8. Keep that date and stay calm.
9. Praise your child for her respectful openness during the argument. 

Use This Sleepover Example to Role-play:

Your 12 year-old son, George, is begging you to stay overnight with a friend you've never met. He says he doesn't know his mom's name or number. You want to introduce yourself and checkout  the sleepover with her.

 

Teach Your Child to Think Clearly and Stay Calm

Use the 9 rules for staying open-minded and come to a consensus. In the end, remember you are still the parent and have the responsibility to make sure your child is safe. The final decision is yours even if your child is unhappy.

5 Reasons Kids Trust Open-Minded Parents

Other Popular Articles You Might Like:

Child Discipline Tips - How to Discipline Kids without Arguments

10 Biggest Listening Mistakes by Parents with 35 Simple Solutions

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With warm wishes,  

Jean Tracy, MSS

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        3. If either side is becoming disrespectful say, "Let's make a future date, when we are both calm, to discuss 101 Ways to Get Your Children to Cooperate

 

Children Love to Give Their Opinions

MANY PARENTS ARE NOT BORN COMMUNICATORS. They love their children but don't know how to talk to their kids. Over-talking turns kids off. Interrupting, sarcasm, and being too busy create a distance between parents and children.

Simple meaty questions and listening well open the door to good conversations. You don't have to do much. If your kids sense you're truly interested in what they think, even if they know you disagree, they'll talk. This means arguing to get them to change their minds is out. But you can ask more questions to get them to think deeper about a subject. And when they're done, you can share some thoughts of your own.

Today's parenting gift includes conversation starters for family dinners, car rides, and bedside chats. Some examples of starters could include:

1. What makes a good person? Why?
2. Would you like to be famous? Why?
3. Should kids have chores? Why?

Listening well takes patience because you might not like what you hear. But if you cut in and correct, you risk not finding out how your child really thinks. Why? Because your child may shut down and not talk. Then how can you guide your child to better thoughts?

Feel free to cut today's parenting bonus into ten questions. Put them in an envelope and pull out when you'd like to have an interesting conversation with your child.

Click - 10 Conversation Starters for a Loving Family

https://www.kidsdiscuss.com/subscriber-gifts.asp

Insert Code Word: Conversation  and download gift.

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Thank you so much.

With warm wishes, 

Jean Tracy, MSS

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• 101 Ways to Get Your Children to Cooperate

 

Sarcasm Hurts Children

If you’re a parent who ridicules your child, and your sarcasm is backfiring, you must change. Why? Because getting your friends to laugh at your youngster causes her pain. Don’t be surprised when your parent and child relationship suffers and your friends gossip behind your back.

Today we’ll share a video with a 1 minute parenting tip that shares a specific suggestion on how to change. We’ll even include the script.

Sarcastic Parents - Don't Push Your Child Away 

Transcript:

Don’t Push Your Child Away

A 60 Second Parenting Tip

Avoid Sarcasm.

You may be witty, a jokester, or very funny.

But it can be hurtful if your child is the object of your jokes.

When others laugh at her she could feel ashamed or ridiculous and foolish.

Stop! Sarcasm can backfire on you.

Your kids could avoid you now and, in the future, too.

Catch your child being good instead.

Tell him specifically what you like.

Use positive words and a pat on the back.

Keep your child close with honest compliments.

Please subscribe to my YouTube video by clicking on my face at the end of the video. 

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Thank you so much.

With warm wishes,  

Jean Tracy, MSS

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Parenting Gifts You Can Easily Give

When you want to communicate better with your child, avoid buying things. Yes, kids do want toys, video games, and new cell phones. But if you experience your kids always wanting more, is gifting material things really a good idea?

This parenting present offers more than 3 gifts. It shares 10. Choose the 3 you need the most. Practice them and feel your parent/child connection grow.

 

 

Repeat What Your Child Said.

Repeating what your child said is proof that you listened. It proves that you paid attention and respect him. Listening opens the doors of communication and creates closeness.

Get your parenting tip sheet by inserting the code word:

Listen

Add it to a 3-hole binder to use whenever your relationship with your child is drifting. Then choose the listening skills you want to practice. Refresh your relationship and enjoy your loving connection.

I just added a second Channel to my YouTube Videos entitled:

1 Minute Parenting Tips

Please subscribe to this new channel by clicking on my face at the end of this short video. I'll be adding more videos soon.

How Parents Give Children 3 Loving Gifts

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With warm wishes, 

Jean Tracy, MSS

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• 80 Fun Activities to Share with Your Kids
• 101 Ways to Get Your Children to Cooperate

 

Getting Kids to Listen Is Easy!

 

In this parenting article you’ll find:

• 10 major listening blunders and the
• 10 painful messages they send to kids,
• 10 easy listening skills
• 10 rhyming self-talk reminders
• 15 conversations starters

Listening is the magic key to your child's heart. 

 

Listening Is the Magic Key!

It gives your youngster the 3 things he craves: attention, appreciation for his ideas, and approval. They prove to him he's important to you.

If you find that one or more of the 10 mistakes is hurting your connection, practice the solutions that will help you the most. And one more thing, if you're having fun, you're doing it right!

Go to article now:

10 Biggest Mistakes by Parents with 35 Simple Solutions

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Thank you so much.

With warm wishes, 

Jean Tracy, MSS

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• 80 Fun Activities to Share with Your Kids
• 101 Ways to Get Your Children to Cooperate

 

When Parents Listen, Kids Respond.

IF YOU'RE A BUSY PARENT and WANT YOUR KIDS TO CONFIDE IN YOU, but don't know how, watch today's brief video. Here's why:

Not having time for kids to share their thoughts or answer their questions can shut them down. When you're too busy too often and you want to change, try this parenting solution:

Listen to all of what he is saying. Be silent. (Did you know silent and listen include the same letters?)

When he's finished, ask questions to be sure you understand. Don't jump to conclusions or immediately say what you think.

Here are some questions you might ask:

• Would you explain it a little more?
• How do you feel about it?
• How is it affecting your life?
• What do you think you should do?
• How can I help?

 

Listening Well Helps Kids Confide.

 Questions like these show kids you're really interested in their thoughts, opinions, and feelings. They show you care. When kids know parents care they just might confide in them more.

This doesn't mean you should be overly intrusive, take over, or do what children could do for themselves. Such parenting behavior could shut kids down even more.

One more thing, you could say after kids share their thoughts, "I'd like time to think about what you said. Let's talk about it a little later." Don't forget to make it happen. It lets kids know you take their concerns seriously. It gives them more time to think too. 

Watch now:

Top 10 Listening Tips for Busy Parents 

 

Top 10 Listening Tips for Busy Parents 

Feel free to copy the transcript below the video and start practicing the parenting tips you need. Your children just might confide you even more. How great is that?

 Like this post? Please share it with your friends on social media.

Thank you so much.

With warm wishes, 

Jean Tracy, MSS

******

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• 80 Fun Activities to Share with Your Kids
• 101 Ways to Get Your Children to Cooperate