How Parents Teach Children Empathy - 7 Steps

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Empathy CAN Be Taught

PARENTS CAN TEACH CHILDREN EMPATHY WITH SIMPLE DISCUSSIONS. Today you and your child will find a childhood behavior to discuss, what mindsets to avoid, and 7 easy steps for teaching empathy.  Use it to help your child grow into a caring person who understands others.

Ask your youngster to analyze this situation by asking, “What don’t we know?”

Sarah gave her friend, Jane, a friendly punch. Jane yelled, “Stop it!” and hit Sarah hard.

Ask your child, "What don't we know?"

Hopefully, she answered, “We don’t know why Jane hit Sarah back so hard.”

Many kids might judge Jane and call her names. But that would put Jane on the defensive and make her mad because no one wants to be judged harshly.

Rather than being a critical judge, ask your child to think of some positive reasons why Jane may have hit Sarah. Why positive?

Usually, when someone does something, even if it’s negative,  it’s for a positive reason. We call it the ‘positive intent.’ This is because the doer, (Jane) is getting something positive out of her behavior.

Yelling girls
 
What Positive Reasons Do Kids Have for Acting Badly?

 

Here are some sample reasons:

  1. Maybe Sarah told her class a big secret about Jane's family and Jane found out. Now Jane’s breaking off the friendship.

 

  1. Maybe Sarah has given Jane too many friendly punches that have bruised her in the past. Now Jane’s showing her what it feels like to stop Sarah from punching her again.

 

  1. Maybe Jane was ridiculed by her class for a wrong answer and she thought Sarah’s friendly punch was intended to tease her for it. Jane’s hitting tells Sarah her teasing isn’t funny.

 

Who knows why Jane reacted the way she did? We’re not mind readers. Only Jane really knows. 

But stepping into Jane’s shoes and trying to see the situation from her point of view, your child is on the path to understanding and empathy.

Tell your child, “It’s hard to feel empathy for Jane or anyone else if you’re judging with a mean critical mind.”

Bigstock_Family_Problems_183002
 
Your Child CAN Switch Her Critical Judgments  to
Understanding Thoughts

 

Rather than judge, teach your child to:

  1. Switch your critical thoughts to exploring positive reasons why she did what she did.
  2. Avoid calling names or making accusations.
  3. Ask don't tell. "Why did you...? rather than, "You did it because..."
  4. Listen without judgment.
  5. Try to see her point of view.
  6. Show empathy with understanding comments like, "I can see why you felt that way."
  7. Suggest she apologize, if appropriate.

If you do, she just might follow your suggestion. All because you asked, listened and cared.

Another important point, when someone acts poorly and you understand why they did it, doesn't mean you agree with their negative behavior. It does mean you chose to understand it.

Use these steps, whenever your child tells you about another child’s negative behaviors. Your discussions will be interesting, and you’ll be teaching her to be an empathic person with an understanding character.

Watch this 2 minute video with 5 questions to help your child turn from criticism to empathy.

How Parents Teach Empathy to Kids


 

The Transcript with the 5 Questions is beneath the video at YouTube when you click Show More. 

Bonus Articles with Videos:

7 Ways to Encourage Positive Brain Power in Your Child   

The Positive Child - 18 Top Parenting Tips and Tools 

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Respectful Arguments: How Parents Teach Children Open-Mindedness

Teaching Your Child 800
 
Parents Can Teach  Children  to Disagree with Respect

 

Any parent can teach kids to be open and respectful. But it takes practice. Today we'll share:

  • 9 simple rules for open-minded disagreements 
  • 1 practice example about a sleepover
  • A 90 second video with 5 reasons why children love confiding in you

9 Rules for Conducting Open-Minded Arguments

Have you and your child ever yelled at each other? Did you feel guilty and wish it hadn't happened? I know the feeling.

Moms - Divorce
 
Respectful Disagreements Take Practice

 

If you're like most parents, you'll have many disagreements with your kids. Now you can turn them into opportunities for open-minded discussions. If you do, you'll be teaching your child an important life skill.

How to teach your child 9 simple rules for open-minded respectful disagreements:

  1. Both speak in a calm voice.
  2. Both hear and repeat each other's words or ideas.
  3. Both take time to find the good points in each other's thoughts.
  4. Discuss each other's good points.
  5. Create a compromise in which each side wins. at least, a little. 
  6. Avoid arguing, yelling, walking away, or being sarcastic.
  7. If either side is disrespectful, make a future date to discuss the issue.
  8. Keep that date and stay calm.
  9. Praise your child for her respectful openness during the argument. 

 

Use This Sleepover Example to Role-play:

Your 12 year-old son, George, is begging you to stay overnight with a friend you've never met. He says he doesn't know his mom's name or number. You want to introduce yourself and checkout  the sleepover with her.

Black Dad Discussing with Boy SMALL
 
Teach Your Child to Think Clearly and Stay Calm

 

Use the 9 rules for staying open-minded and come to a consensus. In the end, remember you are still the parent and have the responsibility to make sure your child is safe. The final decision is yours even if your child is unhappy.

5 Reasons Kids Trust Open-Minded Parents

 

 

 

Other Popular Articles You Might Like:

Child Discipline Tips - How to Discipline Kids without Arguments

10 Biggest Listening Mistakes by Parents with 35 Simple Solutions

 

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        3. If either side is becoming disrespectful say, "Let's make a future date, when we are both calm, to discuss 101 Ways to Get Your Children to Cooperate


How Parent Turn Closed-Minded Kids into Open-Minded Children

 

Dad and Daughter Bigstock 900
 
Raising Broad-Minded Kids Is Fun

 

Closed-minded children, like adults, only want things their way. They won’t consider opposing evidence. They won’t admit when they're wrong. How do parents open kids' minds to other points of view?

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Parents CAN Open Kids Minds

 

Today’s brand new video shows you how to raise open-minded thinkers. You’ll find out exactly what parents can do.

For example, discuss topics kids can relate to, like:

  1. Homework
  2. Bedtime
  3. Lying
  4. Bullying
  5. Texting

Make questions out of the topics and ask children to give two sides. The side they agree with and the side they oppose. They must give good reasons for each side. Finally, they must decide which side is best. They are free to compromise by blending the best ideas from each side.

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Open-Minded Kids Consider Different Viewpoints

 

One huge goal is to help children understand why people think differently. Could appreciating opposing views be one way to learn cooperation, collaboration, and preserve freedom of expression? You be the judge.

Watch here:

How Parents Raise Open-minded Kids

 



Popular Posts with Similar Topics:

How Discussions, Quotes, and Compliments Build Character in Kids

5 Rules for Teaching Your Kids Respect

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Printable Holiday Coupons Your Children Can Give as Gifts - A Freebie

Coupon Character Xmas 449

 

PARENTS, NOW YOUR CHILD CAN GIVE LOVING HOLIDAY GIFTS WITH NO-COST COUPONS.

Today’s parenting giveaway is a set of gift-giving coupons for kids. Your youngster can give them to whomever he or she wishes.

3 Rules for Caring Coupons - Your Child Must:

  1. Be able to do them.
  2. Promise to do them within a time limit.
  3. Give something the receiver would like.

Who Will Receive Your Child’s Gift Awards?

It’s up to your child and here are 5 possibilities:

  • Parents
  • Siblings
  • Grandparents
  • Relatives
  • Friends

These Gift Certificates Can Include:

  1. Work coupons
  2. Fun activities
  3. Caring compliments etc.

Brainstorm with your child what kind of specific awards to give like helpful chores, games to play together, or a list of loving compliments.

Work Coupons Can Include:

  • Fold laundry
  • Fix a dinner salad
  • Weed a flower bed

Fun Activities Can Include:

  • Play a board game together
  • Create a treasure hunt
  • Bake cookies

Loving Words Can include:

  • Drawing a picture of the receiver. Then add loving words in the title. 
  • Writing out 5 loving compliments about the receiver.
  • Asking the receiver to tell her 3 stories about the recipient's childhood. This could include coupons for Mom, Dad, Grandma, or Grandpa.

 

Coupon Character Xmas Girl 450

 

To receive your coupons, go to www.KidsDiscuss.com and insert the code word: 

Presents

Then Download and Copy as Many Coupons as You Like.

 

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10 Ways Parents Listen that Kids Love

 

Hispanic Family
 
Listening is the Key to Family Closeness
 

IF YOU’RE A BUSY PARENT AND YOU KEEP SAYING to your child, "I don't have time to talk," or “Not now,” there could be some parenting consequences.

Not having time could send him the message, “You don’t count. What I’m doing is more important than you are.” Of course, it’s not what you mean but it could be the message he receives. What can you do?

In our parenting video today, the first big tip deals with your lack of time. Let’s say you really can’t talk because you’re on an important phone call. Say, “Just a moment” to the caller. Tell your child when you can talk with him by saying something like, “Give me 15 minutes. Then, let’s talk.”

By your following through, your child will learn 2 things:

  1. Waiting is not the end of the world.
  2. Trusting you to keep your word is worth it.

You are the most important person in your child’s life. Giving him time to talk increases his love for you because your attention and approval are what he seeks.

Watch our video, Top 10 Listening Tips for Busy Parents, and get all the parenting strategies for listening well. They’re easy. They’re short. They work. https://youtu.be/FDfILglXoyw

 

 Feel free to scroll down beneath the video and copy the 10 tips.

One more thing, leave a comment on YouTube and let me know what you think of the video.

 

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Parenting Gift: How Parents and Kids Discuss Bullying - 10 Questions

Mother Thumbs Up
 
10 Easy Bully Conversations
 

 

WANT THE 10 BEST BULLY DISCUSSIONS FOR CHATS WITH CHILDREN?

Whether your child is a bully or not, you can raise your child's social consciousness. All you need are the right conversations.

Discover Today’s Parenting Gift to Help Kids Discuss Questions Like:

  1. If you were bullied, how would you feel and why?
  2. Why do some kids bully others?
  3. Tell me 3 things you could do to help a bullied kid?

The 10 questions are simple and easy to ask. Notice they are open-ended, meaning they require more than one-word answers. They don’t have a specific solution. Such questions give children the freedom to share their own fresh ideas. They might even tell you about a bullying situation at school.

3 Listening Tips for Parents:

  1. Ignore distractions like cell phones.
  2. Avoid interrupting your child.
  3. Don’t judge your child’s thoughts. Encourage them.

 

 

Black Boy Thinking
 
Find Out What He Really Thinks
 

 

When you give your child your full attention, he’ll feel free to tell you what he really thinks. Once you hear your child’s answers, appreciate his good ideas, and ask more questions to make sure you understand. Then you can make helpful suggestions.

By listening well to your child first, you’ll be setting up the situation for him to accept your ideas too. Enjoy the discussion.

Pick up your parenting gift by inserting the Code Word:

BULLY 

at:

https://goo.gl/XuENFu or https://www.kidsdiscuss.com/subscriber-gifts.asp  

 

Consider adding this gift to your 3-hole binder to keep and use whenever you need it.

Raise your child's social consciousness and start today!

 

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Bully Checklist for Parents – 10 Warning Signs

Girl being bullied
 
Your Child Can Stop Bullying!

 

IF YOU’RE THE PARENT OF A CHILD BULLY OR A BULLY-FOLLOWER AND YOU WANT TO BE SURE, open today’s parenting gift. It includes 10 bullying signs.

Yes, bullying has been around since people existed. Today it is not just calling someone a name. Child bullying includes using power to control another with insults, rumors, hitting, shoving, spitting, and tripping. Bullies reject their targets and ban them from their peer groups. Their intention is to hurt the other.

5 Steps to Changing Child Bullying Behavior:

1.  Acknowledge the truth. If you decide, “Yes, my child is a bully,” you are brave to admit it.

2. Increase your bravery by asking yourself, “Is anyone in my family modeling this behavior?”

3. Ask that member to stop the negative behavior. Remind that person your child is watching.

4. Discuss together better ways to model good behaviors that express your family values.

5. Use today’s bully checklist and chat about it's 10 points with your child.

Indian Boy Thinking SMALL
 
Find Out What Your Child Really Thinks

 

  5 Bully Discussion Tips with Today’s Checklist:

1. Model respectful behavior.

 2. Ask, don’t accuse.

3. Find out what he thinks about bullying.

4. Help him see that helping is better than hurting others.

5. Work together on an anti-bullying slogan for his self-talk. Hang back so most of the slogan is from him. Why?      Because if it’s from him, he’ll be more likely to use it.


Download your parenting gift by inserting code word, BULLYING here:

 

Bully Checklist 

Even if you don't need it now, consider putting it in your parenting binder. You might need it in the future. Then nip bullying in the bud.

 

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Bullying Signs: How Parents Recognize Problems and Create Solutions

Child Comforting SMALL
 
"My Powerful Mind Is Thoughtful and
Kind."

 

WHY DO SOME KIDS BULLY OTHERS? Research says that bullying can give kids a sense of power and prestige. The bully wants to have others think he's important. When he hurts kids, he feels dominant and strong. It's hard for bullies to give up such feelings.

 

Some bullies come from abusive homes and treat others like they have been treated. 

 

Research also says that bullies pick on weak fearful kids. Children who are socially awkward, lack self-control, hyperactive, and don't fit in, become easy targets.

 

How Parents Can Help 

In today's article, How Parents Turn Bullies into Caring Kids, you can help both the bully and the bullied child. You will find:

 

  •  7 signs your child could be a bully-follower
  • 3 questions smart kids should ask about bullies
  • 10 parent and child discussions about bullying
  • 10 anti-bullying slogans for your child's self-talk 

  

Black Boy Non-Bully
 
When I See a Victim, I'll Go and
Assist Him.

 

Why not raise thoughtful children who help the kids who are picked on? Being proud of your children is such a great feeling. You'll be building character too.

 

Click on: How Parents Turn Bullies into Caring Kids 

 

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Bullying and Peer Pressure: Parenting Kids to Choose Empathy + Video

Peer Pressure
How Parents Help Kids Avoid Bullying

 

BULLIES BURN BRIDGES BY WHAT THEY SAY AND DO . They destroy connections like trust, friendship, and future relationships with their victims.

Bullying and Peer Pressure

By seeming powerful, bullies can influence other kids. Some children are afraid to say, “No” to the bully. Others follow because they want to "fit in."

Victims never forget how the bully made them feel nor do they forget who followed the bully’s pressure against them.  Being hurt physically, verbally, and/or emotionally, creates painful memories in the mind of the victim. They always remember. Some take revenge.

How Parents Can Help

Whether you suspect you are raising a bully or a bullied child, you CAN guide your child with good discussions.

Many children lack the experience to be wise about causing painful feelings and the importance of caring about others. You can raise their consciousness.

In today’s video, you will find 10 strategic questions to get your child to think more deeply about bullying, to consider the victim’s feelings, and to build the bridge of empathy.

As a bonus, you’ll also find 5 self-talk mottos to help your child choose caring and empathy over bullying.

Feel free to copy the transcript below the video with both the questions and mottos.

Family Discussions:

Use one question from the video per dinner discussion to find out what your child really thinks about bullying. Hold back from jumping in with your opinions. Listen well. Be sure you understand your child's thoughts before you speak.

Enjoy helping your children think wisely about the problems and pain that bullies cause because you CAN inspire them to choose caring instead.

Watch

 

Bullying – How Parents Help Kids Choose Kindness 

or

https://youtu.be/BnULkHcVE2M

 

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How Parents Nurture Their Child’s Inner Life – 10 Ways

Family Sunrise 900
 
Encourage Your Child's Inner Beauty!

 

TEACHING YOUR CHILD TO APPRECIATE BEAUTY, MUSIC, LOVE, AND MORE is not difficult. It takes a parent who cultivates a loving inner spirt and wants to share the peace it brings.

Many people sense there is more to life than what we can see, hear, touch, or feel. If you’d like to help your child to tap into this special sense, consider sharing the 10 easy ways in this parenting gift.

Father Hands Daughter
 
Help Your Child Enjoy a Loving Peacefulness.

 

You can lift your child’s spirit, add meaning to her life and happiness to her inner being.

Download your present now by inserting the code word: PEACE at KidsDiscuss.com

 

Consider adding this gift to a 3-hole binder to use whenever you need it.

 

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