How Parents Teach Children Empathy - 7 Steps

Empathy Critical 900
 
Empathy CAN Be Taught

PARENTS CAN TEACH CHILDREN EMPATHY WITH SIMPLE DISCUSSIONS. Today you and your child will find a childhood behavior to discuss, what mindsets to avoid, and 7 easy steps for teaching empathy.  Use it to help your child grow into a caring person who understands others.

Ask your youngster to analyze this situation by asking, “What don’t we know?”

Sarah gave her friend, Jane, a friendly punch. Jane yelled, “Stop it!” and hit Sarah hard.

Ask your child, "What don't we know?"

Hopefully, she answered, “We don’t know why Jane hit Sarah back so hard.”

Many kids might judge Jane and call her names. But that would put Jane on the defensive and make her mad because no one wants to be judged harshly.

Rather than being a critical judge, ask your child to think of some positive reasons why Jane may have hit Sarah. Why positive?

Usually, when someone does something, even if it’s negative,  it’s for a positive reason. We call it the ‘positive intent.’ This is because the doer, (Jane) is getting something positive out of her behavior.

Yelling girls
 
What Positive Reasons Do Kids Have for Acting Badly?

 

Here are some sample reasons:

  1. Maybe Sarah told her class a big secret about Jane's family and Jane found out. Now Jane’s breaking off the friendship.

 

  1. Maybe Sarah has given Jane too many friendly punches that have bruised her in the past. Now Jane’s showing her what it feels like to stop Sarah from punching her again.

 

  1. Maybe Jane was ridiculed by her class for a wrong answer and she thought Sarah’s friendly punch was intended to tease her for it. Jane’s hitting tells Sarah her teasing isn’t funny.

 

Who knows why Jane reacted the way she did? We’re not mind readers. Only Jane really knows. 

But stepping into Jane’s shoes and trying to see the situation from her point of view, your child is on the path to understanding and empathy.

Tell your child, “It’s hard to feel empathy for Jane or anyone else if you’re judging with a mean critical mind.”

Bigstock_Family_Problems_183002
 
Your Child CAN Switch Her Critical Judgments  to
Understanding Thoughts

 

Rather than judge, teach your child to:

  1. Switch your critical thoughts to exploring positive reasons why she did what she did.
  2. Avoid calling names or making accusations.
  3. Ask don't tell. "Why did you...? rather than, "You did it because..."
  4. Listen without judgment.
  5. Try to see her point of view.
  6. Show empathy with understanding comments like, "I can see why you felt that way."
  7. Suggest she apologize, if appropriate.

If you do, she just might follow your suggestion. All because you asked, listened and cared.

Another important point, when someone acts poorly and you understand why they did it, doesn't mean you agree with their negative behavior. It does mean you chose to understand it.

Use these steps, whenever your child tells you about another child’s negative behaviors. Your discussions will be interesting, and you’ll be teaching her to be an empathic person with an understanding character.

Watch this 2 minute video with 5 questions to help your child turn from criticism to empathy.

How Parents Teach Empathy to Kids


 

The Transcript with the 5 Questions is beneath the video at YouTube when you click Show More. 

Bonus Articles with Videos:

7 Ways to Encourage Positive Brain Power in Your Child   

The Positive Child - 18 Top Parenting Tips and Tools 

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These 7 Parenting Mistakes Kill Curiosity in Kids

Curiosity blocked
 
Don't Shut Down Your Child's Curiosity!

 

Curiosity is the key to learning because it makes studying fun and easy. Disinterested kids with negative mindsets think:

  1. This is boring.
  2. I’ll never use this stuff.
  3. Why do I have to learn this?

Dark clouds of pessimism rule their thoughts. Studying is hard for them. Sometimes parents agree with them and increase their negativity, “Yeah, this does look like a waste of time.”

But other parents turn off their kids' curiosity without realizing it.

 

Worried Boy (2) 600
 
You CAN Avoid These Mistakes

 

Today’s parenting checklist shares 7 errors not to make. Become an informed parent and help your child become an enthusiastic lifelong learner. Get this bonus now at:

https://www.KidsDiscuss.com

and enter the code words:

SHUT DOWN

Copy it to a binder and save it as a reminder.

 

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How Parents Turn Bullies into Respectful Children - 1 Minute Video

Girl Bullying Boy 900
 
Parents CAN Stop Bullying at Home.

 

PARENTING  A CHILD BULLY  IS FRUSTRATING WHEN YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO. If you find you're constantly stepping in the middle and it isn't working, keep reading. Today I'll share 3 tips you can easily use and a 1 minute video with 11 positive suggestions.

You'll know that bullying is occurring,  if one child wants power over the other and wants to hurt the other with hitting, or yelling, or put-downs.

Of course, don't let jealousy be a cause for one child bullying the other. Do your best to show love, attention, and approval equally. Also separate your kids when the fighting starts. Here are 2 ways you can do that:

1. First Tip: Send each child to their rooms to hit their pillows at least 10 times. The idea is to help them let off the steam of anger, anxiety, and revenge. When they are done, get them to talk about the fighting and how to solve it. Let the solutions come from them.

2. Second Tip: Tell them to go to separate boring places in your home where they can't be in contact with each other.

Avoid their bedrooms because they could end up playing with toys instead of thinking about solutions.

Put the timer on for 5 minutes for them to come up a better way to handle the conflict.

Don't let them come up with easy immediate answers just so they won't have to be by themselves and think.

When the 5 minutes is up, listen to both sides. No interrupting by you or them.

In the end, have them act out their solutions.

Third Tip: Use this suggestion when the kids are getting along. A family meeting is ideal.

Discuss the problem with fighting.

Make sure they share their ideas without anyone interrupting.

This is a good time to practice listening skills. They must look at each other and repeat the other's ideas correctly before they get their turn to speak. The goal is to make sure each child feels heard.

Now please watch the 1 minute YouTube video with 11 more suggestions:

Click on: Sibling Bullying - How Parents Can Stop It

 

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Parenting Headstrong Kids - 5 Solutions in 1 Minute Video

Boy crossed arms
 
Power Struggles with Your Strong-Willed Child
Can Be Solved!


THINK OF HANDLING STUBBORN CHILDREN LIKE METAL BEADS AND A MAGNET. Your child's stubborn behaviors are the metal beads. Your reactions are the magnet. Each stubborn behavior can cause a swift and powerful clash if you let yourself explode with emotion. This doesn't have to happen.

Consider Using Logic by Asking Yourself 3 Questions:

1. What are the consequences to our relationship if I consistently blow-up?

       When I continually react with anger, his stubbornness hardens even more. Respect dies.

2. What are better ways of reacting to his stubbornness?

         I can use a kind, firm, and self-controlled voice.  With time and repetition, mutual respect could grow.

3. Are there specific ways to be the respectful parent and turn his headstrong behaviors into cooperative ones?

        If you draw a blank, watch our 1 minute video below. You'll find 5 solutions you can start using today.

Please remember, no parent is perfect. We all get over-stressed and lose our tempers. Don't get down on yourself if this happens to you. Just reconfirm your commitment to be a respectful parent.

One more thing, you CAN make the magnetic pull between you and your child into a pleasant and positive relationship.

Click on: Have a Headstrong Child? 5 Solutions

 

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Parenting Gift: 10 Fun Conversation Starters with Kids

 

10 Conversations
 
Children Love to Give Their Opinions

 

MANY PARENTS ARE NOT BORN COMMUNICATORS. They love their children but don't know how to talk to their kids. Over-talking turns kids off. Interrupting, sarcasm, and being too busy create a distance between parents and children.

Simple meaty questions and listening well open the door to good conversations. You don't have to do much. If your kids sense you're truly interested in what they think, even if they know you disagree, they'll talk. This means arguing to get them to change their minds is out. But you can ask more questions to get them to think deeper about a subject. And when they're done, you can share some thoughts of your own.

Car Conversations

Today's parenting gift includes conversation starters for family dinners, car rides, and bedside chats. Some examples of starters could include:

  1. What makes a good person? Why?
  2. Would you like to be famous? Why?
  3. Should kids have chores? Why?

Listening well takes patience because you might not like what you hear. But if you cut in and correct, you risk not finding out how your child really thinks. Why? Because your child may shut down and not talk. Then how can you guide your child to better thoughts?

Feel free to cut today's parenting bonus into ten questions. Put them in an envelope and pull out when you'd like to have an interesting conversation with your child.

 

Click - 10 Conversation Starters for a Loving Family

https://www.kidsdiscuss.com/subscriber-gifts.asp

 

Insert Code Word: Conversation  and download gift.

 

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The Sarcastic Parent - How to Use Praise Instead - 1 Minute Video

Sarcastic Parent
 
Sarcasm Hurts Children

 

If you’re a parent who ridicules your child, and your sarcasm is backfiring, you must change. Why? Because getting your friends to laugh at your youngster causes her pain. Don’t be surprised when your parent and child relationship suffers and your friends gossip behind your back.

Today we’ll share a video with a 1 minute parenting tip that shares a specific suggestion on how to change. We’ll even include the script.

Sarcastic Parents - Don't Push Your Child Away 

 




Transcript:

Don’t Push Your Child Away

A 60 Second Parenting Tip

Avoid Sarcasm.

You may be witty, a jokester, or very funny.

But it can be hurtful if your child is the object of your jokes.

When others laugh at her she could feel ashamed or ridiculous and foolish.

Stop! Sarcasm can backfire on you.

Your kids could avoid you now and, in the future, too.

Catch your child being good instead.

Tell him specifically what you like.

Use positive words and a pat on the back.

Keep your child close with honest compliments.

 

Please subscribe to my YouTube video by clicking on my face at the end of the video. 

 

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Listening - The Key to Family Bonding - 1 minute video

Mother Listening Meme 400
 
Listening Is Loving!


 

If you and your family are so busy with life that you don’t have time for each other, you might want to slow down. Remember the 10-10-10 Rule by Suzy Welch where you ask yourself 3 questions?

  1. Will this (busyness) matter in 10 days?
  2. Will it matter in 10 months?
  3. Will it matter in 10 years?

In 10 years your 8-year old will be 18. The point is, we need to make room for our children if we want to enjoy a strong family bond. Family bonds can give each member a strong foundation for dealing with life, especially if it's a loving connection.

Today, our 1 minute parenting tip video features a simple solution you can start using today. Here is the video with the script below it:

Listening – the Key to Family Closeness

 

 

 

If You’re a Busy Parent AND YOU KEEP SAYING to your child, “I don’t’ have time to talk,” You could be sending him the message, “What I’m doing is more important than you are.” Of course, it’s not what you mean. What can you do? Tell your child when you can talk with him. “Give me 15 minutes. Then let’s talk.” Don’t forget!

 

If you haven't subscribed to my parenting videos on YouTube yet, you can do so by clicking on my face at the end of the video. I'd be honored by your subscription.

 

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Gift - How Listening Helps Parents - 3 Reminder Rhymes

 

 Step in Shoes Pow.Pt.

 
Listening Is the Parenting Skill that Brings Kids Close


When parents interrupt by talking louder than children to make their point, kids feel angry, unheard, and closed down. If you've ever been interrupted, talked down to, or over-talked, remember how you felt. 

Listening doesn't mean you agree with what your child said. It just means you listened. Of course, if you disagree, don't charge into your child with loud disagreement. Calmly ask questions and listen some more. The better you understand the better your child may listen to you.

Arguing doesn't solves problems. It just cements each side's opinions. We see this in the news every day. I bet there have been times you turned it off. Who wants to hear people fight?

Today's parenting gift offers rhymes as reminders to listen. You'll find 10 altogether. Pick the one you may need and save the others in a 3-hole binder in case you need them in the future. Here are two more of the rhyming reminders:

 

Mother Listening SMALL
 
My child gives me pleasure with
thoughts that I treasure.

 

To be attentive and wise, I look with both eyes.

 

Get all 10 Listening Reminders with Rhyming Solutions by using the code to download:

 

POEMS

 

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How Parents Give Kids the Gifts They Want - 3 Ways

 

 

Listening Triple A
 
Parenting Gifts You Can Easily Give

When you want to communicate better with your child, avoid buying things. Yes, kids do want toys, video games, and new cell phones. But if you experience your kids always wanting more, is gifting material things really a good idea?

 

This parenting present offers more than 3 gifts. It shares 10. Choose the 3 you need the most. Practice them and feel your parent/child connection grow.

Father and Son
 
 
Repeat What Your Child Said.

 

Repeating what your child said is proof that you listened. It proves that you paid attention and respect him. Listening opens the doors of communication and creates closeness.

 

Get your parenting tip sheet by inserting the code word:

Listen

 

Add it to a 3-hole binder to use whenever your relationship with your child is drifting. Then choose the listening skills you want to practice. Refresh your relationship and enjoy your loving connection.

 

I just added a second Channel to my YouTube Videos entitled:

1 Minute Parenting Tips

 

Please subscribe to this new channel by clicking on my face at the end of this short video. I'll be adding more videos soon.

How Parents Give Children 3 Loving Gifts

 

 

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How Parents Listen to Kids – Video Shares 10 Best Ways

Hispanic Family biggest
 
When Parents Listen, Kids Respond.

IF YOU'RE A BUSY PARENT and WANT YOUR KIDS TO CONFIDE IN YOU, but don't know how, watch today's brief video. Here's why:

Not having time for kids to share their thoughts or answer their questions can shut them down. When you're too busy too often and you want to change, try this parenting solution:

Listen to all of what he is saying. Be silent. (Did you know silent and listen include the same letters?)

When he's finished, ask questions to be sure you understand. Don't jump to conclusions or immediately say what you think.

Here are some questions you might ask:

  • Would you explain it a little more?
  • How do you feel about it?
  • How is it affecting your life?
  • What do you think you should do?
  • How can I help?
Son Talking to Dad
 
Listening Well Helps Kids Confide.

 

 Questions like these show kids you're really interested in their thoughts, opinions, and feelings. They show you care. When kids know parents care they just might confide in them more.

This doesn't mean you should be overly intrusive, take over, or do what children could do for themselves. Such parenting behavior could shut kids down even more.

One more thing, you could say after kids share their thoughts, "I'd like time to think about what you said. Let's talk about it a little later." Don't forget to make it happen. It lets kids know you take their concerns seriously. It gives them more time to think too. 

Watch now:

Top 10 Listening Tips for Busy Parents 

 

 

 

Feel free to copy the transcript below the video and start practicing the parenting tips you need. Your children just might confide you even more. How great is that?

 

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