This Mom Can't Listen - 5 Harmful Mistakes, 5 Easy Solutions

1 mom and daughter
 
Why won't this daughter listen?

Parents, who cannot listen, are the worst communicators. They cannot teach effective communication because they don’t practice it. 

Hey there! Are you someone who argues instead of listening to your child? Many parents do. Yet, listening is your most important parenting tool. Don't worry, if you decide to, you can always improve it. There are some habits you might have to brush aside before becoming a good listener.

Today I will share:

5 listening mistakes to avoid

5 simple listening habits to increase

1 simple formula for being your child's best counselor

3 fun listening activities for your family. 

5 Harmful Listening Habits to Avoid as a Parent:

Mom asking us to be quiet

Do you ever:

  1. Interrupt your child?
  2. Discount your child's opinions?
  3. Dismiss your child's feelings?
  4. Criticize your child?
  5. Lecture your child?

Don't be overly concerned because here are 5 easy listening habits that you can use right now. They'll quickly improve your listening skills.

5 Listening Habits to Learn, Practice, and Model:

Black Dad Discussing
 
Father and Son Communicating

 

  1. Look your child in the eye.
  2. Focus on what they are saying.
  3. Remember the key points.
  4. Repeat those points in your words.
  5. Ask questions to better understand your child.

By practicing these skills, you'll become a better listener. You'll be teaching your child good communication skills too. 

Become Your Child's Best Counselor:

Do you know why counselors are loved by their clients? It's because they are good listeners. They practice the 5 good habits. They also include the 70% Law of Communication, meaning, they listen 70% and speak 30%. As a parent, strive to speak less, listen more, and appreciate your child's thoughts and feelings. As you progress, notice how your relationship with your child strengthens. You'll become your child's best counselor too.

Here are 3 activities to make 'listening' a priority in your family: 

3 Activities for Family Listening:

  1. Post a ‘Listening Habit of the Week’ on your refrigerator. Practice that habit in your home and outside your family. ‘Catch your children being good’ with a compliment when they listen well. 
  2. The Morning Forecast: Tell your child, “Name something you’re looking forward to today.” The Evening Review: Ask, "What are some things you are grateful about today?"
  3. Create free time each day and turn off technology. Use this time to discuss both your day and your child's day. Practice the 70% Law. 

Make 'Listening' a priority in your family. Listening Works!

 

Video - Short Clip - 1.11 minutes 

Sometimes pictures do speak 1,000 words. What do you think?

Like this post? Tell me what you think. Please share it with your friends on social media.

Thank you so much.

With warm wishes, 

Jean Tracy

Sign up for my FREE Parenting News and receive:

  • 80 Fun Activities to Share with Your Kids
  • 101 Ways to Get Your Children to Cooperate

Parenting Tip List - Teaching Kids to Judge Character

Mother and Daughter Discussion 2

Mother and Daughter Discussing Character

Judging character is easy to teach. Coach your child to see how a person acts and hear what she says. Is the other kind, honest, and respectful? Or is she rude, unkind, and dishonest?

Training Your Child to Look for the Good 

Good Character is about being honest and having strong moral values. You can trust an honest person. But a dishonest person signals the red alert, "He lies. I can't trust him." The following questions open your child's eyes to finding good character in others.

Parenting Tip List - How to Ask about Character: 

Consider using these discussions around the kitchen table, in the car, or at bedtime.

1. Reject fault-finding in classmates.

  • How can the habit of finding fault in others hurt you?
  • How could fault-finding lead to gossip?
  • What do you think about gossiping?

 
How Could Gossip Hurt Him?
Indian Boy Sad 450

  1. Explore the Qualities of Character:
  • How would you describe someone with a weak character?
  • What are signs of a good character?
  • How would you recognize the good character in others?

   3. Help Your Child Make Friends with Kids of Good Character:

  • How can you be friendly?
  • How can you have fun?
  • How can you be appreciative?
  1. Practice Praising a Classmate's Good Character:

 

Boy and Girl Praising 450
 
Girl Enjoying a Compliment

 

  • Pick a classmate to praise.
  • What would you say? Let’s practice. 
  • Share it with your classmate and tell me what happened.
  • Who will you praise next?

Help your child listen to a classmate's words and see how she acts. He'll be assessing the 'content of her character.' It can influence him about who to avoid and who to choose as a friend. 

Guide your child to 'look for the good' in others. He will find it because you opened his eyes to see and his ears to hear.

 

 

Like this post? Please comment and share it with your friends on social media.

Thank you so much.

With warm wishes, 

Jean Tracy

Sign up for my FREE Parenting News and receive:

  • 80 Fun Activities to Share with Your Kids
  • 101 Ways to Get Your Children to Cooperate

"Stop Tattling!" - 5 Parenting Tips with Video

Tattletale mom frustrated
 
Tattletale Frustration

Are your tattletales driving you batty? Do you want the tattling to stop? Check out the 5 discussions below. Then listen to the 37-second video for a simple solution.

 

Discussion about Tattling

Tattletale smile
 
Tattletale Trouble Maker

With your child, discuss the list below. Ask whether the tattler wants to get help for his sibling or get her in trouble. Then say, "Tell me more."

  1. Mom, she ate all the ice cream.
  2. Dad, he didn’t help me clean the garage.
  3. Mom, her nose won’t stop bleeding.
  4. Dad, he scratched your new car on purpose.
  5. Mom, he poked his eye with a stick.                                      Which tattle gave a motive for the other sibling’s behavior? Did you need more details about any of the tattles? What tattletale complaints frustrate you in your home? Discuss them too.
 
IStock_000002491462Xfamily singing
 
This Tip Gets Kids Thinking

 

Best Parenting Tip for Tattles

This short video clip gives parents one excellent parenting tip for dealing with tattletales. Discuss its solution.

Use the solution whenever one of your children tattles. Be consistent. Let me know the outcome.

If you want more in-depth help - How Parents Stop Kids From Tattling on Sibs.

Like this post? Please comment and share it with your friends on social media.

Thank you so much.

With warm wishes, 

Jean Tracy

Sign up for my FREE Parenting News and receive:

  • 80 Fun Activities to Share with Your Kids
  • 101 Ways to Get Your Children to Cooperate
 
 

Antibullying – Turning Cautious Kids into Courageous Helpers

10 Child Sayings
 
Self-Talk Influences Thoughts, Feelings,
and Behaviors

Bully prevention by playground kids takes bravery and positive thinking. This blog tells you how. You will find 3 discussion dilemmas and a gift of 10 positive slogans to help your child choose right over wrong. Your right-minded kid could become a playground hero.

Parents tell kids, “Don’t slump! Straighten up!” Sagging shoulders with head down look sad, weak and are targets for bullies.

 

Sad Boy (3) 600
 
Slumped Shoulders and
Head Down = Bully
Target

 Our body’s trunk, keeps our shoulders straight. A straight body with head up looks strong and confident. Practice standing with your child. Teach your youngster to keep trunk, head, and shoulders straight.

Your Child’s Mindset

You can teach your child to strengthen her mindset by teaching right from wrong. Mindsets include thoughts, feelings, and behaviors. Kids who know the difference between right and wrong and choose what’s right have strong characters. Help your child think ahead and prepare to act. Problem dilemmas like these 3 bullying situations can do just that.

The Playground Bully 

Boy Bully 745
 
Playground Bully

John is big and strong. He wants kids to know it. Joey is little. His posture looks wimpy.

  1. Is it OK for John to physically shove and punch Joey? Why?
  2. How would you feel if you were Joey?
  3. Should you and other kids stand by and let John bully Joey? Why?
  4. Would you do this or something else that helps the victim?                             
Boy Pfotecting Girl 757
 
How Would You Help a Victim?

Determine if your child’s mindset is strong. Does he choose right over wrong? Unassertive kids might say, “I don’t know” or shrug their shoulders. Their parents have work to do.

Sarcastic Bully

Sarcastic Bully 513
 
Sarcastic Bully

 Gina has a big mouth. She’s funny and sarcastic. Tammy is shy and quiet. Her shoulders slump.

  1.  Is it OK for Gina to make fun of Tammy and put her down? Why?
  2. How would you feel if you were Tammy?
  3. Would you join the other kids and laugh at Tammy?
  4. What would you do?
  5. Is there a way to help Tammy? How?
    Asian tattling 450
     
    Would You Get Help from a Teacher?

If your child is clueless, you need to work on her mindset.

The Tormenting Bully

Bully Tormentor 450
 
Lucas Wants Gail's Attention

Lucas is your friend. Lucas pesters girls by teasing, pulling hair, and tripping.

Lucas has a crush on Gail and wants her attention. Gail has long braids. Lucas yanks them. Gail shouts, “Stop it!” At other times, Lucas says, “You’re so stuck up.” Gail walks away. When Lucas tripped Gail and she fell, he laughed.

  1. How would you feel if you were Gail?
  2. What would you like to tell Lucas?
  3. Would you keep him for a friend?
  4. Would you help Gail? How?
Black Boy Non-Bully SMALL
 
Would You Yell, "Lucas, Stop!"

 

Your child’s answers tell you a lot. Does he know the difference between right and wrong? Do you need to guide his mindset?

How to Teach Right and Wrong - 3 Keys

These three ways will help you coach your child:

  1. Ask him about his feelings regarding a troubling situation. Does he feel for the victim or the bully?
  2. Question his thinking about the bullying. 
  3. Probe about his behaviors. Would he help the bully or the victim?

Empathic kids with right-minded thoughts will rescue victims.

Thoughts, feelings, and behaviors are the three elements that create a weak or solid character. If your child chooses what is right, his/her mindset is solid.

If not, use friendly discussions by asking questions, listening well, and giving your opinion last. Don’t force your ideas, just express them. Otherwise, your child may rebel.

I invite you to use the above 3 discussion dilemmas.

Here are the 10 self-talk sayings to help your child deal with bully situations. You can also teach your child to make their own self-talk sayings.

Indian Boy Powerpt.
 
10 Free Slogans to Discuss with Your
Kids
Insert gift code
 SLOGANS and download your gift.

Like this post? Please comment and share it with your friends on social media.

Thank you so much.

With warm wishes, 

Jean Tracy

Sign up for my FREE Parenting News and receive:

  • 80 Fun Activities to Share with Your Kids
  • 101 Ways to Get Your Children to Cooperate

Turn Your Sad Child into a Happy Thinker – 5 Easy Steps

Frustrated boy SMALL
 
"Nobody likes me."

 

This sad boy talks to himself constantly. He tells himself self-pity thoughts. Find out how to help him.
People talk to themselves a lot. Often, they’re not aware of what they tell themselves.
When their thoughts are happy and healthy, they feel strong and positive.
When their thoughts are sad and filled with self-pity, they feel weak and miserable.

Girl laughing
 
You CAN help your child choose how to think.

 

How can you help your child become

a strong happy thinker? Here’s how:


Pick up your free Happy Thinker Exercise at https://www.KidsDiscuss.com  Insert the code word - THINKER and download your gift.



Like this post? Please comment and share it with your friends on social media.

Thank you so much.

With warm wishes, 

Jean Tracy

Sign up for my FREE Parenting Newsletter and receive:

  • 80 Fun Activities to Share with Your Kids
  • 101 Ways to Get Your Children to Cooperate

Content of Character - Teach Your Kids to Love Like This

Dr. MLK Love 800
 
"There's Something about Love that Builds Up and Is Creative."

Martin Luther King, Jr. wanted his four little children (and all people) judged by the "content of their character," not "the color of their skin." Dr. King believed in love not hate. Find out how character, judgment and love fit together in a way Dr. King might approve.

Effective parents teach children to judge. Not by skin color but by searching for the good.

Today, I’ll share how this love works through the story of Gabby, a family activity, and an activity that increases others’ self-esteem. It creates friendships too.

Practice it in your home. I guarantee it will boost your family’s love. Then watch it spread outward from your family to others.

Family Talk 1000
 
Dad, I like how you take the time to play UNO with me.

The Story of Gabby

(To protect privacy, all the names are changed because the people are real.)

Gabriella, 13 years-old, is taking a peer coaching class. She assists Mrs. Matlin, who teaches 10 special needs children, like:

  1. Daniel, who repeatedly runs around the room
  2. Lucas, who lets out blood curdling screams that make everyone jump.
  3. Olivia, who stutters and gets mad if asked questions she doesn’t want to answer.

 

  1. Bigstock-girl 25718705 500
     
    "I said, don't call on me.!"

 

Find out how Gabby's family activity influenced her with these special needs children. Then consider adopting their simple family ritual:

How Kids Judge Others by the "Content of Their Character"

Dr. King was right. "There is something about love that builds up and is creative." 

Like this post? Please comment and share it with your friends on social media.

Thank you so much.

With warm wishes, 

Jean Tracy

Sign up for my FREE Parenting News and receive:

  • 80 Fun Activities to Share with Your Kids
  • 101 Ways to Get Your Children to Cooperate

Judging - Skin Color or Character? Teach Your Kids This

MLK leadership-g863c98947_900
 
How the Family Makes His Dream Come True

 

August 28, 1963, Dr. Martin Luther King, Jr. delivered his “I Have a Dream” speech. He told the crowd he wanted his four little children to be judged by the “content of their character,” not by the color of their skin.  You can make his dream come true.

Today, my new video will share 2 simple activities to teach your children. It promotes judging others in a way, I believe, Dr. King would approve.

Family Talk Asian 830

Teaching Children To Find the Good in Each Member

 

First Character Building Activity

Gather your family together once a week. Pick a member's name from a special bowl. Each member tells the person with the name they picked an honest compliment. What's this got to do with judging character and Dr. Martin Luther King?  'Judging' includes the good qualities you see in each other. 

Gabby 777
 
"Gabby, I like how nicely we talk to each other. You're
the best sister ever."

 

Second Character Building Activity 

Each member looks for the good in friends, classmates, and teachers. You'll see in the video how simple it is. Your children pay forward what they learned within your family. Imagine them sharing their experiences at your next family dinner.

Diverse Boys 900
 
Toby, your speech about Dr. King was so interesting.

 

Hopefully friends, classmates and teachers will also spread the good they find in others. Why? Because to 'judge' by looking for the good in others makes both the giver the receiver feel great.

It all starts in the family.

Enjoy this video now.  How Children Promote Dr. Martin Luther King's Dream

                                    

 

Like this post? Please comment and share it with your friends on social media. https://youtu.be/A3uC3JS9yFk

Thank you so much.

With warm wishes, 

Jean Tracy, MSS

******

Get my FREE Parenting News and receive:

  • 80 Fun Activities to Share with Your Kids
  • 101 Ways to Get Your Children to Cooperate

How Kids Create School Goals with Mojo

Mojo 624
 
 Mojo Mindsets Helps Kids Succeed

Achieving goals is easy when your child creates a mojo mindset. Just be sure his goals are realistic. 

Tell Your Child:

Pick one goal like –

  • I am getting a good grade on my next math test.
  • I am giving my book report with confidence.
  • I am making a friend at school.

Clear your mind and relax with 5 deep breaths.

  1. See clearly by looking outward at your goal not at yourself.
  2. Sense it with a strong feeling like focusing, confidence, friendliness etc.
  3. Say it starting with the words, “I am… as if you already have it.

   Mojo 4

  1. Put the picture, the feeling, and the words all together in one magic moment.
  2. Do this before getting out of bed each morning and before falling asleep at night.
  3. Take the action to make it happen like studying, practicing your book report, smiling and saying “Hi!”

Enjoy using this mojo mindset to help your child achieve his goals. You can use it too.

My special gift to you:

Download this gift to use whenever it's needed by inserting the code word, MOJO at: 

KidsDiscuss.com

 

Please comment and share this post with your friends on social media.

Thank you so much.

With warm wishes, 

Jean Tracy, MSS

******

Sign up for my FREE Parenting News and receive:

  • 80 Fun Activities to Share with Your Kids
  • 101 Ways to Get Your Children to Cooperate

Is Your Child an I Can't Kid? Solutions Are Here

I Can't 624
 
Help Your Child Become an "I Can" Kid.

I can’t kids feel sad, weak, and fearful. They don’t want to try. They fear failure. They say:

  1. I can’t
  2. It’s too hard.
  3. I don’t know how.
  4. I don’t want to.
  5. You can’t make me.
Boy crying
 
"I Can't" Boy with Negative
Mindset.

 

I can’t kids have a losing mindset. They protect themselves from failure. They lose opportunities to succeed.

Today’s article shows you how to turn self-defeating words into a positive mindset.

This method uses two little words. Instead of future failure they promote present success. So simple.

Asian Boys 900
 
"I Can" Kids with Positive Mindsets.

 

Find out here:

Goal Setting for Kids – These 2 Little Words Work

Help your kids feel happy and succeed.

How do you help your kids think positive? Please share your tips below.

 

Please comment and share it with your friends on social media.

Thank you so much.

With warm wishes, 

Jean Tracy, MSS

******

Sign up for my FREE Parenting News and receive:

  • 80 Fun Activities to Share with Your Kids
  • 101 Ways to Get Your Children to Cooperate

Invitations - How Diverse Families Make Friends

 

 

Interracial Families 800
 
How Diverse Families Make Friends

 

Our Melting Pot Culture is filled with racial and ethnic treasures. When we extend a hand in friendship to one another, opportunities flow-in. But it can be scary.

Cross Cultural Invitations

A Handshake Woman 461
 
Extend a Hand with an Invite

 

Making friends can be risky.

Don’t be shy. Just be frisky,

Smile kindly big and bright.

Extend your hand with an invite,

That crosses cultures and you will see,

Your new friend is filled with glee.

Once that door is open, barriers can be overcome, friendships can begin, and appreciation for our sameness and differences can blossom.

Friendship Ice Breakers 

Girl Flowers
 
Invite Friendships with Flowers

Everyone is responsible to extend a hand in friendship. There are fun and easy ways to break the ice with invitations like:

  1. A neighborhood party
  2. A plate of cookies
  3. A bouquet of flowers
  4. More Invitations Ideas

Racially Diverse Friendships Enrich Us When We:

Hikers 450
 
Arrange Neighborhood Sports 

 

  1. Teach each other our languages
  2. Exchange specialty recipes
  3. Share family traditions
  4. Play board games
  5. Eat dinners at each other’s home
  6. Organize potluck dinner parties
  7. More Cultural Enrichment Ideas

All these ways and more help us love our neighbors as treasures. We grow and they grow.

For more ideas on how to connect with others go to:

Diverse Friendships - How Families Come Together

 
Diverse Heart 450
 
Loving Each Other As Treasures

 

Like this post? Please comment and share it with your friends on social media.

Thank you so much.

With warm wishes, 

Jean Tracy, MSS

******

Sign up for my FREE Parenting News and receive:

  • 80 Fun Activities to Share with Your Kids
  • 101 Ways to Get Your Children to Cooperate