Don't Let Your Difficult Child Become An Immature Adult!
If your child is difficult for his age and doesn’t mature, chances are his probation officer will describe his behavior. Stay tuned for character tips from an expert. Today we will honor Dr. Partridge, a psychologist who spent his life studying immaturity and character in kids. First we’ll discover what he learned as a young consulting psychologist to probation officers. Then we’ll look at his Four Cornerstones of Character.
10 Mistakes Probation Officers Described in the Character of Their Probationers
Each sentence had to begin with the word “When” ~
“1. When he gets his butt out of bed in the morning and hauls it off to work just like the rest of us.
2. When he quits strutting around and roaring like some kind of lion king.
3. When she gets beyond blaming her parents for all of the zeros in her life.
4. When he learns something more than punching people out when things don’t go his way.
5. When she stops talking about how stupid her boss is.
6. When he can think about something other than how sick he feels.
7. When she stops lying to me and trying to manipulate me.
8. When he can just keep a job – any job.
9. When she isn’t constantly doing things to attract attention.
10. When he can think beyond trying to get something for nothing.”
Dr. Partridge noted how these adults acted like immature children. They hadn’t grown up.
Jean Tracy's Experience
Having been a pre-sentence evaluator myself, I understand what the officers meant. My job was to interview those convicted of crimes and write a report to the judge with recommendations for sentencing. So many of those interviewed blamed everybody but themselves, were lazy, and manipulative. When interviewing them, I listened for one thing, a sense of responsibility. Usually there was none.
Because of his work with students, parents, and teachers, Dr. Partridge developed his Four Cornerstones of Character. As you read his four cornerstones, think about what you’re doing to promote them in your children. Hopefully, they’ll never need a probation officer.
The Solutions: The Four Cornerstones of Character
“1. Ability to take responsibility for one’s self and to move beyond blaming others and external circumstances.
2. Ability to give up being the center of one’s social world and to develop a 50/50 give-and-take capability.
3. Ability to defer gratification and inhibit impulses.
4. Ability to accept frustration without ‘blowing up’ or ‘falling apart.’”
In my opinion, to build character in kids, parents must be firm, kind, and consistent. Without these parenting skills immature kids may become immature adults. Why? Because they'll lack Dr. Partridge's Four Cornerstones. Do you agree?
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Let's applaud the fine work of Dr. Partridge.
The list and the Four Cornerstones of Character are excerpts from Dr. C.R. Partridge’s book, Building Character Skills in the Out-of-Control Child.
Pick it up at: Amazon Books
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Bonus Article:
Character Building Tips For Parents of Kids Who Whine
Parents, it's your turn to take the stage:
What are your opinions about this blog post or your suggestions for helping your kids? Please answer in the comment link below.
With warm wishes,
Jean Tracy, MSS
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