Character Building from KidsDiscuss.com

How to Hold Powerful Family Meetings Kids Love

The family meeting core is powerful. It holds the seeds for family growth. Why? Because those seeds insure children, as well as parents, have a voice. Everyone has a say on what to discuss, problems to solve, and fun events to plan.

Let's See Which Values Those Seeds Produce ~

1. Respect that makes every member feel important
2. Skills for listening well and speaking clearly
3. Connection because members solve problems together
4. Excitement because members suggest plans for fun events
5. Education because members learn to work in a loving group
Building character with fun family meetings is powerful. The core ingredient within family meeting is discussions. Discussions give birth to a loving home.

Here's a Short Discussion List from our eBook, "33 Family Meetings Kids Love"

1.  Family Fun ~ "Let's Go Fishing!" gets kids involved in planning a fishing trip.

2.  Family Values ~ "How to Keep Kids Safe from Doorbell Strangers," helps kids discuss safety.

3.  Family Skills ~ "How to Help Your Kids Discuss Friendship Skills," helps kids learn the art of making friends.

4.  Family Bedtime Routine ~ "How Kids and Parents Solve Bedtime Battles," teaches kids to share ideas and become part of the solution.

5. Family Values ~ "How Kids and Parents Discuss Gossip," helps kids discuss the problems with gossiping.

6. Family Fun, "Create a Family Cookbook," involves kids in choosing their favorite recipes and putting the cookbook together.

Beware! How to Hold Unpleasant Family Meetings Kids Hate ~

If you want family meetings kids hate, make them gripe sessions. No one wants to be put down, yelled at, or nagged. Some parents call family meetings to control kids and give them a scolding. No wonder those kids hate family meetings.

Hold Pleasant Family Meetings Kids Love ~

From the short list above, kids speak up, give suggestions, plan solutions, and make them happen. Children feel the seeds of their personal power. You can help them grow by planting them in the fertile soil of pleasant family meetings.

What do you do to make your family meetings pleasant and powerful?

Blogging about character, parenting, and family solutions ~ Jean Tracy ~ www.KidsDiscuss.com

 

 

 

10 Ways to Turn Your Kids' Criticisms into Compliments

Is your family life filled with kids criticizing each other? Do they whine and blame to get each other in trouble? There is a better way. Let's find out how to turn their criticisms into compliments.

The family meeting includes rounds of compliments.

Each member praises every other member. This means your child needs to remember a positive action each member did during the past week.

The one giving the compliment ends by praising him/herself. This self esteem booster sets the family on a positive path because everybody loves an honest compliment.

To help your children find the good in each family member, discuss these 10 sample compliments:

1. Mom, I like how you hug me when I come home from school.
2. Dad, I like when you laugh at my jokes.
3. Mom, I like when you hold my hand.
4. Dad, I like when you wrestle with me.
5. Mom, I the fact that you drive me to gymnastics.
6. Dad, I like how you read to me at bedtime.
7. Mom, I like how you put something special in my school lunch.
8. Dad, I like when you take me swimming.
9. Mom, I like how you listen to my problems.
10. Dad, thank you for helping me build my fort.

Consider These Action Steps:

Read and discuss the compliments to your kids.

Get your children to give you a compliment at bedtime.The next day ask your children to tell every other member a compliment. This can be done at dinnertime.

Share your results. We're listening.

Jean Tracy, MSS blogs about character, parenting, and family solutions ~ her website ~  www.KidsDiscuss.com

 

 

 

Family Meetings – How Kids Discuss Gossips

When kids gossip they don’t realize the trouble they cause themselves and others. The family meeting can help. Look inside and find out how.

In my book, Character Building on BackTalk Street, Gabby the Gossip phones Betty the Bragger, “Hi Betty, guess what I saw at Tilly’s house last night? I saw her dad’s teeth in a glass of water on the kitchen sink.” Page 51

Why not read a story about gossips to teach your family values? Here are some questions to use in your family meeting?

The Family Meeting

Let’s discuss Gabby the Gossip. These questions will help your children think through the problems with gossiping.

What did Gabby need to learn about gossiping?

Why do you think kids gossip?

How do you feel when someone gossips about you?

If you gossip, will kids stop sharing their secrets with you? Why?

What advice would you give to gossips?

Don’t be surprised if your kids love discussing this problem. They’ll get to share their thoughts, real examples, and feelings about gossiping. If they already gossip, they’ll think twice before they gossip again. You’ll be raising their family values and building their character too.

These family meeting blogs will become my next eBook.

Want to have your comments, questions, tips, and first name included in this next Family Meeting eBook? Just leave your comments below.

If spelling or grammar is problem, don't worry. I'll do the editing. To assure you of quality, no links or objectionable material will be included.

Family Meetings ~ How Kids Discuss Chores and Like Them Too

How can family meetings promote “Work before you play?” When your ‘Sammy the Slacker’ sneaks out of chores, watches you do them, or would rather play than work today, use the family meeting.

 “If work’s your thing,

Don’t count me in.

I’d rather play,

Than work today,

Gone fishing!”

From Sammy the Slacker in Character Building on BackTalk Street. page 81.

Why not announce, “We have a problem? Let’s get together before dinner and discuss it.” Have your kids guess what the problem is.

Family Meeting

Discuss how, “Work before Play” motivates kids to get their chores done. 

Listen to their ideas.

Ask, “How could kids tackle their chores and like them too. They might say, “That’s impossible.”  Take time to laugh.

Say, “No, I’m serious. Let’s brainstorm.”

Listen again. Tell the note taker to write the suggestions in your Family Meeting Diary.

Perhaps you’ll use the Chore Chart Kit. If so, consider one of the 80 Fun Activities as rewards for doing their work before they play. Pick up the 80 fun activities by subscribing to my free parenting newsletter at http://www.KidsDiscuss.com

Family meetings are excellent for deciding on age appropriate chores You’ll find them in my Chore Chart Kit with a special chart, and rewards. Why not train your kids to become responsible for their chores and like them too? Don’t do all the work. Share the chores.

 

Want to have your comments, questions, tips, and first name included in this next Family Meeting eBook? Just  leave your comments below.

If spelling or grammar are problem, don't worry. I'll do the editing. To assure you of quality, no links or objectionable material will be included.

Family Meeting – How Kids Discuss Preparing a Family Meal

Do your kids love to cook? Most kids do. Look inside for parenting tips on how to help them.

"After a good dinner one can forgive anybody, even one's own relations." – Oscar Wilde

Family Fun – Kids Discuss What to Cook

After you’ve taught kids how to use knives, operate the oven, and measure ingredients, what’s next? How about working side by side with you? Let them watch. Show them how. Give them small tasks. Hold a family meeting to plan a family meal.

Family Meeting

Help your kids discuss what food they like. Make sure the meal is one each child can help prepare.

Ask Your Kids:

What do you want to prepare?

Who will print the ingredients?

Who wants to go to the store?

Who will do the chopping?

Who will cook the food?

Who will set the table, clear the table, or wash the dishes?

Will there be candles, music, decorations?

When will the dinner be?

 

Let them share all their ideas. Feel their enthusiasm. They may argue a little while preparing the meal. That’s OK. Once the meal is ready they’ll forgive each other. Feel their pride. Give them the praise they deserve.

 

Keep track of the delicious meals your children create in your Family Meeting Diary.

What meals do your kids enjoy making? Please share.

 

Want to have your comments, questions, tips, and first name included in my next Family Meeting eBook? Just  leave your comments below.

If spelling or grammar are problem, don't worry. I'll do the editing. To assure you of quality no links or objectionable material will be included.

 

Family Meetings – How Kids Discuss Blaming

When your kids blame others for their own misbehaviors, watch out.

If you always accept what your child says and scold the other child, you may be raising a blamer. Try not to get in the middle. Use the family meeting instead.

“Look what you did, you stupid kid. It’s all his fault.” Page 3 from Billy the Blamer in Character Building on BackTalk Street

Your kids will have lots to say about blaming. They see it at school, in the neighborhood, and maybe they’ll see it in themselves too.

The Family Meeting

Let’s use Billy the Blamer’s story from BackTalk Street. Here are some questions to consider for your family meeting:

1. What’s wrong with Billy blaming others for his mistakes?
2. How do you feel when someone blames you for something you didn’t do? Why?
3. How do you think other kids feel when you blame them? Why?
4. Is admitting a mistake better than blaming? Why?
5. What advice would you give a blamer?

Your kids will have lots to say about blaming. They see it at school, in the neighborhood, and maybe they’ll see it in themselves too.

To avoid your child from becoming defensive, discuss blaming by reading a short story about it. This means you won’t be directing the conversation at your child’s behavior and he’ll feel freer to share his thoughts.

Key Idea: When you know how your child thinks, you’ll be better able to help him. Why? Because building character starts with getting your kids to talk.

One more thing, remember to set up a weekly time for holding family meetings. You’ll enjoy the meetings and you’ll be building character in your child.

Pick up Character Building on BackTalk Street. It has games, puzzles, stickers and discussion stories about the kids and their misbehaviors on BackTalk Street. Read the stories at your family meetings. Enjoy the discussions.

All these family meeting blogs will become a Family Meeting eBook. Do you want to have your comments, questions, tips, and first name included?  Just  leave your comments below.

If spelling or grammar are problem, don't worry. I'll do the editing. To assure you of quality no links or objectionable material will be included.

The Family Meeting: How to Improve Grades, Homework, and Family Life

Do your children avoid homework? Would they rather relax and watch television? Find out how family meetings can promote grades, homework, and family life.

“Too often we give children answers to remember rather than problems to solve.” - Roger Lewin

Many families rush to sports, music lessons, and other appointments. When there are too many daily events the family feels scattered, out of touch with each other, and cranky. Homework slides. If this happens in your home, consider the family meeting.

The Family Meeting

Discuss the best time for homework at the family meeting. Schedule homework time. Get the children involved. Listen to their suggestions for the following:

·     Will study time be before or after dinner?

·     When to check that the homework is correct and neat?

·     Will TV or computer games be allowed after homework is checked?

·     Will there be rewards for doing the homework well, like game time with you?

Getting children to solve when to do their homework promotes their cooperation. It helps them experience the good feeling of being organized. They’ll get better grades too. Why not use the family meeting to improve homework, grades, and family life?

Want more help with family meetings? Get Jean’s ready-made notebook, the Family Meeting Diary at http://www.kidsdiscuss.com/parent_resource_center.asp?pr_id=kd006 and keep track of all your meetings. You’ll love reading about your family’s successes.

How to Use the Family Meeting to Build Family Love

Do your kids dread family meetings? Do they fear getting scolded for things they did wrong? Look inside for a special way to use the family meeting to build family love.

“The quickest way for a parent to get a child’s attention is to sit down and look comfortable.”  - Lane Olinhouse

Try This Family Love Builder

If you’d like your kids to sigh, roll their eyes and complain, start your family meetings with crabby looks and criticisms. But if you’d like your kids to smile, start it with compliments. Each person in the family compliments the others and then him or herself. Here are some sample compliments:

The Family Meeting

·     Andy, I liked how patient you were when we waited in line

·     Daniela, I smiled when you asked the new girl to play

·     Kelly, I’m pleased that you’re brushing your teeth after meals

·     Jerry, you have a creative imagination and the story you just wrote proved it

·     Dad, I like when you laugh at my jokes

·     Mom, I have fun cooking with you

I always looked forward to hearing my boys praise me. It made me feel loved and appreciated. You and your kids will love hearing compliments  too.

Avoid Negative Endings

When you start your meetings with compliments, you’ll need to teach your children how to give them. A compliment should only include positive praise. Avoid negative endings like:

·     Dad, l like when you laugh at my jokes because I know you're  actually listening to me

·     Mom, I have fun cooking with you when you’re not cranky

·     Kelly, I’m pleased you’re brushing your teeth after meals because your breath doesn’t smell as bad

 

Use the Family Meeting to Build Family Love

 

Sit down with your family. Look comfortable. Start the family meeting with compliments. You’ll be setting a positive tone for the rest of the meeting.

 

Your children will learn how to give praise too.

 

How do you start your family meetings?

 

Jean Tracy, MSS, invites you to subscribe to her Free Parenting Newsletter  at http://www.KidsDiscuss.com and receive 80 fun activities to share with your kids.

Family Meetings ~ The Secret of Dealing with Bullies

Is there a bully hurting your child? Does he poke fun of your child in front of others? Does he hit? Look inside to find out how the family meeting can help.

“The most important thing that parents can teach their children is how to get along without them. – Frank A. Clark

How the Family Meeting Can Help Your Child Deal with Bullies

How do you know when to step in? What should you do first? Consider starting with the family meeting. Of course if the bully is physically abusing your child, you must step in.

Imagine gathering the family together and discussing the bully. Go around the room asking for information. Let each child speak. Make sure no one interrupts or hogs the conversation. Discuss the following:

·     Find out what the bully does to your child

·     Ask if your child wants help

·     What do the other siblings think should be done

·     Who thinks the school authorities should be told

·     Make a plan for dealing with the bully that your child accepts

Kids love helping each other deal with problems. They don’t want bullies hurting their brothers or sisters. They also have the power to come up with great solutions. Your bullied child will feel the family support too. What a special way to bring the family close together!

How does your family deal with bullies? Share your solutions below.

Additional Help:

Solve problems together! Let my Family Meeting Book

 be your guide. Pick up my Family Meeting Diary at http://www.kidsdiscuss.com/parent_resource_center.asp?pr_id=kd006 

Family Values ~ 3 Ways Family Meetings Teach Family Values

Dear Parents,

Do your children express your family values? Or are you worried about their attitudes? Inside you'll find out how family meetings can help.

Today let's look at how family meetings teach your children the values you hold dear. Discussions are the key.

3 Ways Family Meetings Teach Family Values:

1. Let's say your 8 year old leaves his toys and clothes all over the house. In family meetings you can ask each member what they think of leaving clothes and toys around. Find out what each would do to get a messy person to pick up after himself. Listen especially to your 8-year-old. Ask him to make a commitment to pick up his things and write it down. Post it on the refrigerator.

    

2. Imagine your 11-year-old had the neighbor kids in the house when neither parent was home. More importantly he lied about it. The family meeting is the perfect place to discuss how lying breaks down trust. Again ask your 11-year-old to make a commitment to tell the truth. Write it down and post it on refrigerator as a reminder.

    

3. Pretend your 6-year-old swears using vulgar words when playing outside. The family meeting is a great place to discuss the family's views on swearing. Ask your 6-year-old to make a commitment to used better language. Write it down and post it on the refrigerator.

Can you see how the family meeting is better than lecturing, yelling, or nagging your kids to act better? At the family meeting you can take the time to discuss problems, get everyone's viewpoint, and make plans to improve. Besides making commitments to make the family better, you can chart the better behavior and give rewards too. The family meeting is a super way to teach your family values and build character. Give the family meeting a try. If you'd like to have a book filled with ready-made family meetings to fill in, pick up The Family Meeting Diary .It will become a treasured keepsake of what your family said and did.

With warm wishes for your parenting success,

Jean

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 With warm wishes for your parenting success,

Jean

Jean Tracy, MSS